Wednesday, February 24, 2010

It's OK to be Normal

Earlier today I read This Rock magazine. A letter to the editor said that most people who wrote to the magazine appeared to be committing the sin of scrupulosity, excessively worrying about details of their faith and faith practices. The editor responded that real scrupulosity is not a sin; it is a psychological disorder. In general, asking questions about the Church’s teachings, even the fine details of its rites, is seeking knowledge, which in itself is a good thing. It made me wonder, however, about my asking so many questions; do I worry over getting the answers too much?

Later this evening, a friend called, worried about a relationship in his life and where it was going; and what did certain details about he-said, she-said mean. And my friend was worried about where God was in these concerns; He didn’t seem to be helping matters. Speaking honestly, he wondered if he’d abandoned his friendship with God, and how could he now find Him again. Listening to the concerns, I was largely silent. No matter how much I stared at the crucifix in front of me on the wall and shrugged my shoulders at it – Well?? – no words came to me for a response to my friend. I guess God wasn’t talking to me on the matter either. I guess my trust in Him, like my friend’s, extends as far as our next worry – if He doesn’t answer promptly, either He or I aren’t paying attention, and we worry about which.

I listened to Dr. Laura’s radio show on the way to church in the late evening. The caller was in graduate school and seeking a very difficult degree; the subject itself was challenging, but even more so, she felt, was the competition. The caller was anxious about how well she would match up on tests. Dr. Laura rightly counseled her that being number one on tests was not of primary importance, some people are very good at rote memorization and may do better on tests than her. What is more important than test knowledge is application knowledge. Do you know the subject well enough to apply it well, so you can excel at the practical day-to-day results of your career and life, not just the test scores?

Then Dr. Laura went on to say that the caller’s anxiety was normal. Someone who has always done well at school and been at the top of her class chooses a graduate program which admits nothing but those at the top of their classes. For the first time in her life she feels real competition; she feels threatened. Dr. Laura noted that the vast majority of students, and adults for that matter, are just average; they’re used to competition and they’re used to being sometimes beaten by others. This is normal and it’s OK to be normal. Part of life is about competition, and failures, and anxieties about these things. But part of life is also about successes and happiness. Don’t be anxious that you have anxieties! It’s OK to be normal; don’t worry about it. And then Dr. Laura and the caller laughed together at their mutual understanding; it’s OK to be normal.

I titled this blog Do Not Be Anxious, from Matthew 6:25. Reading it again tonight I found a new understanding of it: “Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you shall eat or what you shall drink, nor about your body, what you shall put on.” Jesus is counseling us to not be anxious about being normal! Of course you have decisions to make in your life, things to do, places to go, and words to say. Do the best you can, and then trust in God. Don’t be scrupulous in your decisions, don’t seek God for every answer – He will find you! And learn to laugh some at the trials we face – trials are a normal thing.

Look out!! Here comes another one! :- ))

May the Lord answer in time of trial;
may the name of Jacob’s God protect you.
May he send you help from his shrine
and give you support from Zion.

May he remember all your offerings
and receive your sacrifice with favor.

May he give you your heart’s desire
and fulfill every one of your plans.
May we ring out with joy at your victory
and rejoice in the name of our God.
May the Lord grant all your prayers.

- Psalm 20

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