Insanity

Life is hard. We have toils and troubles – and even terrors – that we can do nothing about. Others give us “great” advice, often ending with: “Well, all you can do is pray.” We know they are friends and trying to help us, but they just don’t understand us and what we are feeling – and we can’t really put it into words. And it is doubly hard if they are the ones causing our pains, and they don’t know why.

This quote is often attributed to Einstein: The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, and expecting different results. Spoken like a true scientist, but also spoken like a man of faith, for Einstein believed in God, even if he found it difficult to trust in Him. With his great intellect, Einstein believed he could solve any problem, and sometimes looked to other men for ideas, but only to inspire him solve the problems he faced. He really didn’t trust the work of other scientists because he believed he knew more than they did. He died never finding the answer to his biggest scientific problem, finding the “Universal Theory of Everything”, which would relate together all the known theories of matter, like electromagnetism, thermodynamics, relativity, and quantum physics. Perhaps his judgments of other men’s relative scientific intelligence were true – although it seems arrogant to me. In his judgments about God, however, I believe Einstein was, by his own definition, insane. He trusted himself over and over again, and never got a different result.

I gave some examples in recent days of my trust in God. I wrote of Peace, Prayer, and how God answered my prayers, how indeed he seemed to work miracles for my mom. I know there are other explanations for her cure. I know you may be saying: “Well, if there was a reason for it, then it wasn’t a miracle.” Perhaps. When when I saw the changes in mom, I went out searching the internet for why this happened, and what I could do to help her. There were a number of reasons for what happened, what caused it, and what I might do to prevent it again – maybe.

Perhaps you are right and her cure was not a miracle, but can you prove that to me? If the chaos happens again to her, will YOU tell me how to make it stop? Gather all the data you want and bring in the best doctors, will YOU guarantee results? Don’t you see? The miracle I wrote about was not in her, it was in ME. I actually believed and lived that U.S. motto: I trusted in God. The miracle was the peace I found in response to my prayers. I felt God’s presence. Now this time I saw mom’s healing, but at other times I may not. This time my pains promptly ended, at other times they may never end. But regardless, I can bear those pains much easier; I can find peace. I am not alone. Someone does understand. He really understands my pain and sorrow. It gives me great peace to talk to Him about them because of my trust in Him.

I said how difficult it is to trust other men; it is counter to our instincts. But we also have an instinct for God, his existence and his love. Even Einstein felt it. And unlike other men, God can help. By my witnessing to my trust in these words, I hope to open your eyes and hearts to your instincts. I can’t fix anything wrong in your life. You are right to not trust me or anyone else, not with your life. We don’t really understand what you need – not for sure. All we have is our experiences, our understandings, and that they might apply to you. But YOU can fix your life. If you could bring yourself to do something different, to trust in God, the being who you CAN trust your life to – He created it – then I know you will see miracles even as I did. People will tell you good things which happen are not miracles. But you’ll know, you’ll KNOW, the miracle in the peace you find. Perhaps you’ll see no great changes in the problems in your life; look at the example of Job – things got worse. But if you have faith, God will figure out how to make good out of the worse -- that also happened to Job. Faith and Trust in God comes from first choosing to believe in God, and that he knows solutions you’ll never figure out. He IS God, not you, not me. That’s the first thing you need to believe.

If you get nothing else from these pitiful writings, get that: you can choose to have faith. (He gave you free will too, you know. :- )) ) It’s not insane to trust in God. What is insane is to do what you’ve been doing, trusting in no man for help, but trusting in yourself over and over and over again – and expecting different results. Sometimes we can’t help ourselves. From the sadness in some of his writings, it appears Einstein never learned that truth.

All of us are living a life in a way estranged from other people. We know OF them, but we really don’t know them. We ASSUME we know what they do and why, but we are not them. We don’t know some of the instincts they are feeling, the instincts that they feel to save themselves, basic instincts similar to our own. We feel we must be the one to save our lives, to end our pains – and they feel the same things. So they often act in ways we perceive as hateful to us, and they look at us and see the same thing. We want to find the solutions, ourselves. Similar to Einstein, we are all searching for the “Universal Theory of Everything,” – not about matter, but everything about our life. Why our pain, why others pain, why others don’t understand ours, or we theirs. A universal theory that would explain all reasons for our being this way. It’s a theory that we are not smart enough to figure out alone. It is arrogance to think so. And if we keep trying to do that, it is insanity.

God knows the reasons for everything. Perhaps it is time we all start to look to Him for answers, and then Trust because He IS God, we may not always understand His actions in our life, but in Faith and Trust we can choose to accept them. And then we will find the miracle of peace in our lives. Einstein’s definition of insanity started with OUR doing things over and over again. We started out this meditation saying that our life is hard and there are some things that WE can do nothing about and other men can’t help us because they don’t understand us – but God, God can help, because he DOES understand. He really does.

Lord God, I choose to trust in you. When my road seems mired or rocky, help me find a path forward. When a steep wall appears before me, help me find the footholds to climb it. When strong winds, freezing sleet, or walls of dust obscure my way, take my hand and guide me. But please, dear Lord, if it is your will, also let my path go through fragrant fields of flowers, through cool shallow streams, through glorious sunrises and peaceful sunsets. Give me consolations to offset my pains. Let me know that you are with me.

Even if I can’t yet imagine the beautiful fields, the calm streams, the beautiful skies as I walk through my personal valley of death, know dear Lord, that I now pledge my trust in You. I WILL to have faith. I WILL to walk through the darkness. I trust that if I can go on, and hold out my hand, You will be there. Please, dear Lord, guide my footsteps. I trust in You.

In You will I find my peace. You promised; I believe. It would be insane not to.