Reunions

I didn’t have any expectations of my elementary school reunion brunch in Chicago last Thursday.  The trip to there on Wednesday from Detroit was uneventful, and the hotel and meeting place turned out to be conveniently located nearby an expressway exit.  It seems the planners of the event did a good job picking the location.

I arrived the night before the reunion and after checking in at the hotel sought out an adoration chapel for my night prayers.  Arriving at St. George’s chapel I found a sole person in the chapel, and before I began my prayers I interrupted hers and asked about the time for morning mass (no bulletins or mass times were obvious in the small chapel).  She told me morning mass was at 7:30A and, finding I was from out of town, she began a discussion of the church, and her life.  She seemed a humble person, working many jobs during her life and still working in her senior years --- “I need the money.”  I gave her a copy of The Better Part I had in my car, and later I prayed for her.

The next morning, I arrived at St. George’s at 7AM, the first to arrive, to say my morning prayers.  As the clocked ticked away, no one else came.  Finally, at 7:45A I told God I’d miss receiving Him in communion this morning, but I trust that this is His will, and so I got up to leave, and then noticed a few others at the back of the church.  “I guess there is no mass today,” I said.  Then a man who had been doing some cleaning in the church spoke up: “Oh, I didn’t think you were here for mass; today only the mass is being held in the school at the back of the church!”  We all rushed out the door to the school, and arrived just as the Our Father was completed, in time for communion.  And I thanked God for having heard my prayers.

The reunion brunch was about a dozen people.  The private room in the restaurant made for ready conversations, which were many.  Materials provided included pictures of our graduating class, a local newspaper announcement with our names, and the addresses of people present and some who could not attend.  About a dozen of the class of 44 people had died.  I found myself seated between the one person I had maintained some contact with --- Jim and I had gone to high school together --- and someone who had a number of life experiences (and faith growth) similar to mine.  People at the event took turns giving a summary of their lives --- the summaries often interrupted by long side conversations.  Most summaries seemed to me to be a catalog of what people thought important:  career success; fame and honors; and, of course, financial success.  I guess all these successes could be said to have grown out of the education and faith foundations we received at St. Isidore’s school, but that was never mentioned, and when my turn came I said a brief prayer for the gathering and our meal, mentioned a couple of my life failures, and said I was now working to help others with my life.  Period.

As I said, I had no expectations of the gathering; I had no participation in the planning on which to set any expectations, but still …., I left feeling a bit let down, but I couldn’t tell you exactly why.

My 4-hour drive home was safe, and uneventful.

The next day, Friday, I had invited 9 friends to a fund-raising dinner for a local charity.  The friends, for the most part, did not know each other.  I know them; I volunteer with them in various charitable works; I wanted them to know each other as I know them, and come to celebrate as I do, God’s goodness in giving us opportunities to serve His children --- as all the charitable works do.  These were good people, and I wanted them to know and celebrate their works together.

When we arrived, everyone was given an event program and numbered cards to be used on raffle tickets, rather than having to write our name on each ticket.  We all joked at my number: 0001.  I wasn’t sure of the financial condition of all my guests, so I, in addition to paying for the dinner donation, insisted they accept money for raffle tickets: “I invited you as my friends, not to come and spend money.”  I brought a bunch of raffle tickets, and despite my simple number I found putting it on each ticket tedious.  Noticing the nun sitting at the next table I asked her: “Sister, do you feel lucky?” “I feel blessed,” she responded, and I gave her half my raffle tickets to put her number on.

After everyone had arrived, I made the table introductions.  We had a good dinner and some conversations, but then the 10-piece band started up --- very loudly!  There was no more table conversation, except for yelling into the ear of a nearby person.  Still, all had fun; some even danced.  And, at one point I glanced at my phone and saw that I had a voicemail message.  I went outside to listen, and heard that a small donation I made earlier in the week was wired to India, and First Communion dresses bought for 3 girls, whose mom would not let them (and her?) be embarrassed by their poverty.  They now would receive their First Communion, the voicemail said, this Sunday, and on hearing it I smiled, and it seemed the evening had turned into one of joy for me.  Later, raffle prize winners were announced and two people at our table won prizes, as did the nun I had provided tickets.  Smiling and hugging me, she looked at the blankets and teddy bears she had won and said: “Now I have Christmas presents to give.”  That was another evening highlight for me, but there was more.

I won a major raffle prize, as they called out: “Number One???”  It was $800 worth of wine and booze (about 50 bottles).  There were lots of jokes about that as I went up and had my picture taken, holding number 0001. Later, while loading my car many joked: “Don’t let the cops stop you on the way home.”  They didn’t, but along the way a stopped train blocked our path, and I did a u-turn to go home via another route.

And then that night, at home, I recalled how I had recently become aware that when I see my plans, my path, blocked unexpectedly, I should be asking: “Are You trying to tell me something, Lord, by blocking my plans?  Is there something You would have me aware of or do?”  And thoughts of the events of these last two days flooded my mind.  Was I missing something?

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It took a couple of days of thought and prayer for me to be able to step back and see a bigger picture of the reunion events.  I was considering the events, and their results, from my point of view, and how I might have desired their outcomes.  One of the events I didn’t plan, and the other one I did, but neither came out as I might have wished.  Neither brought about some close confidences, some personal sharing time, some “I’m glad we met and understand each other” satisfactions.  Things just didn’t go as I expected.  But then I remembered that roadblock, and tried to step back.

There were many things that happened that I did not expect, did not plan.  The woman in the adoration chapel in Chicago, and the last-minute prayer answered for communion for myself and a few others.  There were emails exchanged at the brunch for future contacts.  At the dinner, I received phone news of something totally beyond my control, as were the prizes won by so many, including the nearby sister.  And contacts WERE made, and emails exchanged there also.  Who knows why these things beyond my plans happened; but were they God’s plans that I had some small role in?  I now think so. 

I did things which I felt were the right things to do, even Godly things.  They didn’t turn out as I planned, however, I now think that I forgot something which I’ve come firmly to know and believe:  I am not walking alone; He is with me.  So, when I think about MY plans I really should be thinking OUR plans.  I need to remember and trust that if I try to do the right things, He will be with me in my efforts, turning my mistakes into good results (even if I can’t see or understand them), and blessing my good efforts in ways I could never had planned.  Together, we can make great results --- each doing our part, and trusting the other to do theirs.  That is the lesson I take from these events.  I need to remember and trust that I am never alone.  And these reunions?  They’re just a shadow of the reunion He and I will enjoy some day, and the results will be far better than anything I could have planned.

Oh, and all that booze and wine I won?  The local Catholic girls high school accepted my donation, and I hauled all the cases over to the school on Monday.  So, was this final action a good plan on my part?  As it turns out, no, even in this God had me beat.  The lady helping me unload my car at the school mentioned how on Friday (at the school) there was a final meeting of an event coordination committee, of which she was part.  “The fundraiser will be in two weeks, and all the plans were complete.  Still, one of the committee members asked: ‘Shouldn’t we perhaps buy some booze for the event’s auctions?’  But she was told by the chairman that ‘if God wants us to have booze, He’ll give us the booze.’  We are done.”  And so, when I offered to donate the booze on Saturday, I guess my plans weren’t totally unexpected.  They weren’t my plans, but Ours. 

So, for the dinner I received a letter telling me of the tax-deductible portion of my donation, and I’ll receive a letter from the school for my donation of the booze.  That plus the value of all the other prizes won means that the entire evening, dinner for 10, and entertainment was a break-even.  I wanted to make a donation to a good cause and to bring good friends together, but you can’t out-give God.  His donations, and His plans are just awesome.  All I really had to contribute was trust.

And ah yes, I DO look forward to that final reunion, and for that I am leaving all the planning to Him. 

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We Belong to God

None of us lives as his own,
And none of us dies as his own,
For while we live we are responsible to God,
And when we die we die as His servants.

For both in life and death we belong to God.
That is why, Christ has died for us and come again.
We shall all appear before the judgment seat of God,
For it is written “Every knee shall bend before Him,
And every tongue shall give praise to God.”