And Death Comes ...

I’ve been reading Michael Augros’ book: The Immortal in You.  He asks the question: What is different about the body which was alive one minute, and dead the next?  All the physical parts are still there, what changed?  And he goes on, through his entire book, to explain what science cannot explain:  Why is there life?

Why am I alive?  Why are you alive?  Why now?  Is it random evolutionary survival of the fittest?  Is there no purpose, no meaning, like the roll of the dice?  Sadly, an increasing number of people believe that life has no ultimate purpose, and they live for the moment, for THEIR moment, thinking their life, their happiness, matters to no one else, and only exists --- not unlike the life of an ant that exists.

A long-time friend of mine has died --- and he lives.  His wife, his two sons --- my Godsons --- know he lives.  His life DID have a purpose, here on earth, and in eternity.  And because of his life, the life of his wife, his sons, me, and so many others are changed for the better.  Michael Augros’ book does not just explain the physical difference between a live and a dead body, but between life and death:  from a scientific and philosophical point of view, an immortal soul exists.

My friend, Chris, lives on.  I used to talk to him when I visited or called, but now it’ll be much more convenient.  There’ll be sadness at not seeing that face or that smile again --- but I miss my youth, too.  But that’s okay.

Life goes on, and death comes, and life goes on.

You know, I never liked surprise parties or surprise gifts.  I always liked being prepared for things in my life, whether for a big meeting or for the weather outside.  I prepared for those things to make them better events for me.  The Boy Scouts had it right:  Be Prepared.  A life well-lived is not a series of random events, it’s one with a series of events we are prepared for.

And death comes.  Death is no random event, nor should it be a total surprise party; it comes to everyone.  It makes me sad to think that more and more people are choosing not to be prepared.  It will indeed be a big surprise for them.  Unprepared, how messy will their house be on that day?  What will they think when the most important boss they ever had shows up to their surprise meeting, and finds them not prepared?

I am sure my friend, Chris, was prepared for his big meeting.  He met with his Boss, got a huge promotion --- and a raise --- and has now moved to a distant, better location.  We probably won’t see each other for a long while, but when we do it, I am sure, it will be a big party.  I’m happy for him, and I look forward to our future meeting.  I’ll be prepared for it.  And I pray that every friend I had or have will also work on being prepared.  When we all meet again, oh, I want it to be such a big party.

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Grant Lord, that my heart may ever be
turned toward heaven where You await me.
-- Divine Intimacy, Meditation 182

Those were the first words I read tonight after writing these reflections on Chris.  I guess God wanted to remind me that He’ll be at the big party, too.  As a matter of fact, it’ll be at His house!

And so, it goes on: This morning I read my daily Gospel chapter and Psalm; my bookmarks were at Matthew 15 (Be prepared) and Psalm 145 (Give Him praise).

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Just a final thought I want to capture this day.  Today in my diocese the Catholic Church celebrates the Ascension of Jesus, and meanwhile our country celebrates Mother’s Day.  For me and many others, these celebrations are appropriately together, for our mothers have gone from this world, as Jesus did.  But He said: “I go to prepare a place for you,” and I trust our mothers are now recipients of His promise.  So today some go out to celebrate this day with their mothers, while others, like me, go into the chapel to celebrate this day with our mothers.  And as Catholics we celebrate one other person today, Mary, THE mother of all eternity; to her also I give thanks. 

Thank God, for all mothers, everywhere.

A Complete Day

The night began with a sudden urge to grab a copy of the book Humility Rules (which I recently reviewed) from the back seat of my car before I walked into the chapel for my midnight adoration hours.  I gave the book to the woman there, as she was leaving, as she was stopping to wish me a good night --- as she does every Monday night/Tuesday morning.  And then, to my surprise, as I handed her the book she handed me a letter.  We exchanged thanks, as I put her letter aside and continued the rosary I had begun.  But a few minutes later I heard the chapel door open again; she had looked at the book I had given her, and came back to give me a hug: “I so needed this book; thank you so much.”  And I responded: “Well, if it is what you need (pointing to the altar), then He gave it to you.”

Unbeknownst to me, I later surmised that He had also given me her letter.  I read it.  It was a heartfelt letter asking me for prayers, and telling me the very confidential reason why.  This stranger felt enough confidence in me --- or in despair chose EVEN me --- to pray for her.  And so, I pondered on the Joyful Mysteries, contemplating on her trials, and my own.  And the meditations stretched into hours.

As I prayed, I thought about the trials of life, hers, mine, Mary’s and Jesus’, and how those trials can be turned into joys.  Trials in this life have a purpose, and very often not one which we can perceive, and that purpose is good.

I thought of my early years, how I tried to live a good life, and my regrets now that, looking back, I did not even know what a good life was.  I was taught very well the good things you are supposed to do in life, but not how to do them well.  I was taught that those are things I must do, and I did them, so that I might lead a good life.  But it wasn’t.  My life was about me, and that was the source of my many trials.  Oh, I did things for God, as I was supposed to do, but even those things were in some way for me.  I never really learned that my life was not only about me; I never understood that “it is not I who live, but Christ who lives in me.”  And without Christ in me, I failed at so many important things in life, and even if I became aware of my failures, I didn’t know why.  Why had I failed, when I’d done everything right?

And the real reason was:  I walked alone.  I had no relationship with Jesus, and never knew that was a key to a life lived well.  And so, as I completed this day and meditated on the Joyful Mysteries, I contemplated on what I now know makes a complete day, a day well-lived, one which gives joy.

These are things we should try to do each day, during our days of trial, during our days of loneliness, and during our days of joy, for these are the things which will bring us true joy, with no regrets over the past failures or trials.

A complete day, lived well, is one in which you:

·         Love someone (Humility Rules)

·         Speak with God (and the oftener, the better)

·         Give a hug (showing someone they are appreciated for being God’s presence to you)

·         Meet a poor person (Poor in $$ or poor in spirit, be God’s presence to them.  Speak to them by name)

·         Find Joy (In particular, in those you meet each day.  Discover the reason God had them cross your path, and act towards them as He would)

·         Help someone else to love (All the other things are what you have done and benefit you, but a complete day --- in God’s eyes --- is one where you have helped someone else to live a complete day, by teaching him, or by praying for him so that his days may be complete --- if your day ends with you, it is not enough, it was not well-lived.  In some way, each day, you must have made an impact that goes on, that changes someone, that opens them to God’s love for them. Mary gave birth to Jesus on this earth, in a way, so must you.)

·         Give thanks at day’s end (Goodnight, Lord)

Will every day be one of joy?  Of course not.  But every day can be lived well, a complete day which accomplishes the things which Jesus might have done in your shoes.  And that is the key “why” of your life, why you should do these things:  because that is why He made you, just as you are, with all your trials, pains, --- and blessings --- He made all these things part of your life for a reason, so You can be His witness, His presence. 

And all these thoughts came because one stranger gave me a letter, asking for prayers.  It was a great blessing for me.  By asking, she helped me to love.  It was a great joy.

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Spring finally arrived in Michigan.

Living and Letting

There come times in our lives when we are uneasy, when we perceive God has some plan for us, and we become anxious:  What is it?  Myself, over the years I’ve often struck out at such times, I mean I felt compelled to move forward, but often, looking back I’ve seen I’ve struck out all right, as in strike three!  And I’ve realized that my anxiety had led me to do SOMETHING, when I should have waited for clearer direction, or just trusted, period.

It’s hard to trust in God, sometimes.

It’s one thing when we perceive God has some plan for us, and we try to understand.  I have become sensitive to the fact that sometimes I see my plans blocked --- I’ve even run into roadblocks on the highway! --- and I’ve learned to stop my plan and pray:  Lord, do You have some other plan for me this day?  And often by praying, and looking, I see better ways, better uses of my time.

It’s another thing, however, when we perceive that God has some plan for someone else; our paths have crossed and we are confident God has put this person in our life or a reason.  I ask this question of God for each person who crosses my path each day:  Why him; why now?  Is there something You wish me to do?  Is there something I should learn from this encounter?  Was I Your presence to him, Lord?

And He gives me answers, I am sure --- but sometimes I don’t understand.  And especially if I perceive He wishes me to help (to love in some way) that person, I sometimes don’t understand how.  And I fear I might fail Him.  For He trusts me, too.

In Father John Riccardo’s latest book (a great one) he gives the example of a large football stadium full of loud cheering fans.  They are not playing the gave on the field, but they hope to influence the players and the outcome of the game by their loud cheers.  Father John notes that we are the players on the field of life, and our departed loved ones and the saints are in the stands of heaven, cheering us on, praying for our victory.  That analogy gives me comfort.  Sometimes, however, it seems I didn’t hear the play He called, and after the snap a play seems to be happening, and I wonder what I should do.  Do I run with the ball, pass, or handoff?  What do I do, because I know I must do something, now!

I think one thing I often forget, in the crowd noise, in the expectations (and recommendations) of my teammates, and even with all my training:  I often forget that at any point, despite all the pressure, I can call a time out.  I can go back to the coach and ask Him to repeat the play called for me, to make sure I understand it, because I know it is important I get it right before I proceed.

Especially when I see someone I know God wishes me to love --- the poor person, the sick one, the despairing one --- which He has so clearly put in MY path, I want to run the play, to do SOMETHING to help.  To love them.  But sometimes when we seek clarity for what we should do, the answer is: nothing.  We need to let them (and us) go on living, as is.  Sometimes we need to let God do the major work, to carry the ball in His way.  It’s not all up to us.  We are not the only player in the game of our life, or theirs.  And sometimes we need to sit quietly and wait, and let someone else be the star of this play.

Humility is hard, which is why we must pray for it often, and then trust.  We live our life as best we can, with God’s help, and sometimes it means letting go of our worries.  That is what trust is all about.