Am I Teachable?

 

It is often said that someone is “set in their ways”.  What does that mean?  Certainly, at any moment we are unique persons, different from anyone else, even different from who we were earlier in our lives.  But today, when we are “set” in our ways, are we set as concrete, changeable only with a chisel and much work, or as wax which can be melted and molded by the flame of God’s love?  This Advent we should spend some time reflecting in prayer, talking with God, about what “set” us to be who we now are, and what He’d like us to grow to be.

Was our present “self” caused by people who abused us, or times when we were neglected or ignored?  Or, did we get “set” gradually as events of our lives hardened us in our ways?  Are we sometimes angry things aren’t going our ways, even angry with God? 

Spend time in prayer this Advent talking to God about who we are, and what we want to be.  And then sincerely ask: “And what do You want me to be?”  Advent is a time for preparation of Jesus’ coming.  It means not just changing decorations in our houses, but changing us.  It is a time for not just giving presents, but reflecting on the ones which have been given to us, and with hope, even expecting more.

Often our prayers are telling Jesus what we want to make us happy.  Those are like the prayers of little children.  Real adults recognize that they are not alone in the world and Jesus is hearing not just their prayers, so adult prayers include others.  It is hard to get to a spiritual level of being where we try to love our neighbor as God does, and making it a focus of our prayers.  We need to talk to God about that, and listen.  And with His help, change our ways to be even better than we are today.

Teach me, Lord, to be who You created me to be in this hour.  Soften the hardness of my heart.

- - - - - - - - - -

I have been reluctant to enter closed buildings where other people might spread the virus to me.  A local parish offered parking lot masses this summer, where you could see the mass in front of you and hear it on the car radio.  Then a pyx was brought to you to distribute Communion.  It was a great way of participating in mass without having to risk being in a closed building.  But even better, I think, is that that parish offers parking lot confessions every Wednesday, where you form a line of cars and as a priest becomes available you park near his car and he listens to your confession in a corner of the parking lot, as you tell God (through the priest) your sins and ask His forgiveness, and discuss as necessary your resolve to repent and change.  These outdoor confessions will continue through the winter, or the virus is stopped.  Talking to another person about our failings and hearing forgiveness said aloud is a unique sacrament and blessing. 

My parish makes communion available outside the church after mass 3 days a week.  I participate in masses broadcast on television each day. Confession, Communion, and mass are all bringing Christ to me.  I yearn to do those things within His church building and with others, but for now He comes to me.  “In the darkness, there is light.”

I could be upset at all I cannot do because of this virus, but I have learned to be thankful for what I can do.  It’s taken me a while to get to this place, but I am teachable, as I await His next lesson.

Jesus, I trust in You.

Quiet Moments

 

There is an interesting historical parable about vanity.  In Vienna the emperors of the Austro-Hungarian Empire are buried in a Capuchin friary.  I suppose it was considered the humblest place to be buried.  The funeral procession would go from St. Vitus Cathedral down to the Capuchins.  The grand duke would ceremoniously knock on the locked doors of the friary.  A little window would open and the superior would say: “Who is it?”  The duke would answer something like this: “Franz Joseph, emperor of the Holy Roman Empire, king of Hungary, margrave of such and such.”  The superior would say, “We don’t know him.”  So, he’d knock again.  “Who is there?”  “Franz Joseph, his most Catholic imperial majesty, elector of the Pope, etc.”  The answer would come again, “We don’t know him.”  The duke would knock a third time and the superior would say, “Who is there?”  Then the grand duke would say, “Franz Joseph, a wretched sinner who seeks a place to lay his bones.”  Then the door would open.  Only in death do some of us face the need to divest ourselves of the world’s vanity.  It would be wonderful if we could get over our sensitivities sooner.

                                    --- Quiet Moments, by Fr. Benedict Groeschel, chapter 27

 

In our lockdown for fear of spreading disease, we have lots of time this Advent.  I and others I know have chosen to pull books off our bookshelves, ones with lots of underlines in, to read and learn again things we thought important, but have since forgotten.  The book by Fr. Groeschel has 120 short stories like the one above, easy reading. 

In the one above, we see humility chosen in death.  I meditated some on humility after reading it.  I say the humility prayer each night; it is a prayer to accept being humbled, something hard to do --- but I’m getting better.  But there is another side to humility.  It is one thing to accept being humbled, by things beyond our control like this virus (or death), but it is another thing to choose humility, like St Francis whose feast day is today.  He chose a humble, simple, life and to live among the poor. 

I recently heard of someone thinking about downsizing their home, moving to a smaller home in their old age for various reasons you can guess.  The reasons are benefits to them of moving to a smaller living space.  It reminded me of one time long ago when I was welcoming new people into our parish, and often when I visited the young new-comers I found them in a huge house with little to no furniture.  They could afford the house, but not the furnishings ---yet.  They wanted the grand size and style because they thought they deserved it, kind of like the grand duke above thought he deserved great honors, even in death.  Wouldst that those young people I visited chose humility and bought a small (furnished) hut, which is all they needed, and found those who had more need of their other monies than themselves. 

Very few people choose humility, as Jesus did.  Yet, that is one of the examples of how to live that He became a man to show us.  Rather than focusing on Himself, He chose to love others.  That’s the example of His whole life, and what He set before us.  He said His pathway is narrow ---- certainly not fit for someone thinking himself deserving the riches of a king.

It’s something to think about this Advent, when we have so much time available.

- - - - - - - - - -

 

The mass readings in recent weeks have been telling us to prepare for His coming.  Many reflect on this in consideration of Christmas, Christ’s birth.  But the readings also were referring to His coming again.  They tell us to be prepared.  Some of my Zoom meeting groups discussed that.  Often the discussion wandered to things that need to be done in preparation for our death, like wills and legal papers, “my bucket list” of places I still want to go and things I still want to do, and a few spoke of going to some people to ask forgiveness, or to a long-loved one and saying something perhaps understood but rarely said:  “I love you.”  Few, however, would say they were prepared should Jesus come now, today.  And we discussed why not, and how we might become better prepared.  In general, we agreed that we would be better prepared if we knew Him better, and He knew us better --- if we prayed more, with the end in mind.  Jesus isn’t just someone in heaven, He is someone we will meet, perhaps very soon.  Advent might be a good time to prepare for His coming, to really prepare, to get to know Him better. 

And with our end and that meeting in mind, can we choose to be humble as He showed us, now? 

What will He say when we knock?

Advent --- Prepare for a Friend

 

Today is the first Sunday of Advent.  I think it snuck up on me, being so close to Thanksgiving.  At the EWTN mass this morning I saw the priest’s purple robes, a sign of preparation and of mourning:  Jesus is not here yet, but He is coming.  At a point in the mass I reached for my prayer book to say the Gloria Prayer, but that is not said during Advent.  We pray that prayer and give glory and praise to God when He is here, not in anticipation.  Advent is a time of preparation, anticipation.

After mass, I plugged my Christmas tree lights into the timer; they will be on tonight, visible to my neighbors, and me, reminders of His coming.  I put the Christmas wreath on my table, along with its 4 candles.  Tonight, I will light the first as I say my night prayers, reminding me to be prepared.  I found a glass Christmas tree in the cabinet, full of small red and green mint candies, shaped like hearts; it smelled very nice.  Christmas is a wonderful day.

The priest at mass, speaking about preparation, said we sometimes say “The grass is greener over there --- but that often means you need to water your own lawn.”  We seldom think that way, that we have to change.  The recent Scripture readings all spoke of always being ready, being prepared, for He comes at a time we do not know.  The Jews thought they were prepared for the Messiah’s coming; but Scripture tells how unprepared they were.  Christmas was His first coming and we celebrate it, but we need to be prepared NOW for when He comes again, whenever that might be.  Whether He comes to us, or we die and go to Him, we need to be prepared to meet Him.

In families, we often act in selfish ways because --- “we want to have our own space”.  In our world right now, we are forced to keep our own space, to keep our distance.  Are we happy now?  The same “having our own way” yearning infects our relations with our friends or co-workers, or strangers.  We act in ways to keep us apart, but humble prayer is absolutely necessary for true conversion; it is the start and end of growing closer to God.  Advent is a time beginning that humble prayer, to grow closer to Him; He is coming.

A fire does not burn long if it is a single stick of wood, but a large, close bundle burns brightly and long.  It ensures the fire does not go out in any single stick of wood, but burns to the end.  We are here for each other, family, Church, country.  We need to grow close together.  We need to let Him light the fire.

Love one another.  This is the focus of Advent.  Prepare to start a fire in new hearts, for a spark will soon come with His birth.  Advent is a time to prepare for the coming of the Lord, His Love.  The Christmas tree is a reminder of when He came, but also a reminder that He will come again.  We need to grow in prayer and love, as He taught us, to prepare.  Advent is a time of preparation.

“Let us remember that love grows through sacrifice.  Without sacrifice there is no love.” --- St. Maximilian Kolbe, who gave his life for another at the Nazi concentration camp.  I pray to him each morning.

- - - - - - - - - -

 

When I found the Advent wreath in a cabinet, I also found a small plaque, given to me by a woman in 1998 who I no longer remember.  But the words are worth remembering:

Dear Friend

How are you?  I had to send you this letter to tell you how much I love and care for you.  I saw you yesterday; you were walking with your friends.  I waited all day hoping you would talk to me.  As evening drew near, I gave you a sunset to close your day; a cool breeze to rest you, and I waited.  You never came.  Oh, yes, it hurt me, but still I love you because I am your friend.  I saw you fall asleep last night, and I longed to touch your brow, so I spilled moonlight upon your pillow and face.  Again, I waited, wanting to rush down so we could talk.  You awakened late and rushed off for the day.  My tears were in the rain.  Today you looked so sad, so alone.  It makes my heart ache because I understand.  My friends let me down many times, but I love YOU.  I try to tell you in the quiet grass.  I whisper it in the leaves and trees.  I clothe you with warm sunshine, with love.  Just call me --- talk to me --- it is your decision.  I have chosen you and because of this, I will wait ------------- because I love YOU!

Your friend,

                                        JESUS CHRIST

We Are Family

Today is the Feast of the Presentation of Mary, the Mother of God.  As a child Mary’s parents followed the Jewish law and presented her to God in the Temple.  Her parents, Elizabeth and Joachim raised Mary in a family with God as its heavenly Father.  And Mary, and the world, were greatly blessed for this family.

The December edition of First Things Magazine has an article titled: The Fury of the Fatherless (you can read it here:  https://www.firstthings.com/article/2020/12/the-fury-of-the-fatherless).  It gives facts about the many children raised fatherless in our country, especially in large cities, and how they search for that missing father figure in their lives --- in gangs or other groups.  Often, they totally reject any father figure --- God, government, or others’ fathers; although United States citizens, they would never fight for this country.  The article cited Portland’s supportive treatment of teen runaways for over 30 years.  Often called teen hobos, they are leaders in the Portland riots, tearing down everything, including statues of our country’s father figures, not to build something better but only out of hate and frustration.  The article also notes that almost all historical socialist leaders and atheists lacked a safe father figure in their youth.  So, they abhor the concept of family or marriage.

Late last night I watched an old episode of Law and Order, SVU.  The episode opens with a masked man knocking on a door.  When opened, he shoots the mother and father and teen-aged daughter there --- or so it seemed.  It turns out the young girl was hit by a bullet which went through her father; she was not a target.  The girl survives.  We find out that her mother was involved in a gay relationship and planning to leave her father to get married to the woman who was advocating gay marriage.  The young girl’s father was a drinker and gambler, and had the girl place his bets, and be sexually abused.  And in the end, we find out it was the teen age girl who convinced a preacher to kill her parents.  It was an old SVU episode with huge echoes of today.  I think if they re-id the episode today, however, they would emphasize that the mother was a good person and the gay relationship was wonderful in light of the evil father --- and of course, only the father would be killed.

And also, yesterday I heard news of a local parish priest be dismissed from his large parish.  The bishop emphasized there were no sexual issues, but it was unclear beyond that.  I already hear of sides being formed, and the priest hiring a canon lawyer and issuing a press release.  And another beloved father figure is cast aside, and more hate fomented.

The traditional family is broken.  The Church family is broken.  The country family is broken. But, the Church is an image of The Trinity, an unbreakable family.  The country is/was one nation under God, (although many now remove the “under God” from the pledge of allegiance, in the rare instances it is recited).  All these things are beyond my control, even as the Covid is, but I WILL to love my family, friends and country even if they are not perfect.  I resolve to act as a father figure, with love, to all I meet.  It’s example Jesus gave to me and all people, His Family.  He showed us how to love, as a family does. Family is a good thing; we were made to be in a family.

I will pray.  I will trust.  “O Jesus, I surrender myself to You, take care of everything!”  (The Surrender Novena)

And I will love all people as His family, and as mine.