Review: Humility Rules

This book doesn’t make sense --- at first.  A man is described who seems down on his luck: “stressed out, bummed out, overworked, underappreciated, and anxious.”  And then the book’s author says that there is a solution to this man’s problem, a 12-step self-help program to improve his life.  It is The Ladder of Humility, a 12-step program to greater humility. And reading those words I almost screamed aloud: “What!  This guy’s in the dumps already and you’re telling him he needs to be more humble?  That sounds nuts!!”

But, I read on, and learned the importance of knowing where you are in life, and having the humility to accept things as they are --- and then further, the humility to accept that there is a reason for why things are as they are.  In subtle, short chapters, the author explains that God created every life unique, with a unique purpose.  In humility we learn to pray and act not with a “Here’s what I want, Lord” self-confidence, but a humble “I trust in You.  Show me what You want” love.  As the book’s subtitle notes, this is Saint Benedict’s 12-step guide to genuine self-esteem. It’s taking to heart the words: “I trust in You.”  The book’s title not only references the rules of humility, but that humility must rule in our lives.

This book has deep, yet has short chapters --- with homework at the end of each; it is interesting enough that it will resonate even in teenage minds with short attention spans.  It may also help change their “I know everything” mindsets into more open ones.  (And referencing the book, parents could quietly ask them: “Did you do your homework?”)  This could even be a good family read, around the table, one chapter a night.  I’ve already given away a dozen copies of this book to friends.  It is a classic.

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Today’s gospel is on The Good Shepherd.  In light of this book, I see how we should all be good shepherds amidst those God puts in our lives.  We need to be able to say as Jesus said: “I know my own, and my own know me.” --- and then accept them (and ourselves) as they are, perhaps as joys in our lives, or even trouble.  And we accept them where we are in the flock, in our role right now, perhaps amidst what seems darkness or rain, perhaps out looking for the one who doesn’t want to be found.  This gospel , like the book, is telling us to do our best, and not worry about the outcome, but to love and pray “I trust in You.”

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In my night prayers last night, I saw some old words I had read literally hundreds of times in the past, but I saw them in a new light, and so I underlined them in my prayer book, so I would not forget:

Psalm 4

When I call, answer me, O God of justice
… have mercy and hear me!

O men, how long will your hearts be closed,
will you love what is futile and seek what is false?

It is the Lord who grants favors to those whom he loves;
the Lord hears me whenever I call him.

… Make justice your sacrifice, and trust in the Lord.

This prayer starts out saying: Lord, give me justice, just as when we often pray when we ask God for things we think are just and right and good.  But the last line of the Psalm says to make justice your sacrifice --- not your prayer.  It in effect says “Lord, I think this is a just solution to my problem, but I offer up what I think is just, and instead my prayer will be: I trust in You.”

That was the message of this book.  Wherever we are in our life, happy or troubled, content or seeking solutions --- or praying for them, wherever, our prayer should be: “I trust in You.”  You have put me here and now for a reason, Lord, I trust in You.

There is a reason for the saying “It’s hard to be humble.”  We need to work at it.

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In my life, God showed me a large problem, and asked me to fix it.  I prayed.  I developed a solution.  I then prayed, begged, for the means to achieve it.  And in a surprising way, one day He gave me the means I had prayed for.  Then, the very next day, He showed me that I could implement my solution --- but that He had a better one.  It didn’t take much thought for me to see that His solution was indeed a better one, in many aspects.  But His solution, once started, was beyond my control.  I could be at great risk.  To do things His way required a much greater trust, for I was not in control.

It’s hard to be humble, and to say with all sincerity: “My Jesus, I trust in You.”