Who is Lost?

I was reading the Gospel meditations in The Better Part (#204) about the Lost Sheep (Lk 15:1-10).  I noticed two things there worth remembering.

First, the Good Shepherd left the ninety-nine “in the wilderness,” to go after the missing one.  I guess I always thought of that Parable as Him leaving the flock in a place of safety, but that is not what He says.  He left them in the wilderness.  Well, if they were in the wilderness, why is it good to leave them at risk to save the one who put himself at risk?  Might that be “penny-wise and pound foolish”?  Wouldn’t it be a greater tragedy if some disaster happened to them, than if the one stayed lost?  What would the owner of the farm think if his shepherd left the ninety-nine --- at risk --- while he wandered looking for some missing one?  Among other things, wouldn’t the owner tell the Shepherd to “count again before you go wandering all over the place looking for just one missing?  Maybe it’ll find its own way back.”  Why was it such a good thing to leave the ninety-nine?  The meditations in TBP led me to realize a key point, often not stressed here.  The Shepherd considered them HIS flock.  They knew HIS voice --- they knew Him.  So, while He turned His focus to the lost one, He did not leave them alone --- they had each other, in community.  They knew Him and what He wanted them to do.  They were safe, following His commands as they remembered them, encouraging each other to not go astray.  I think that’s an important point I often forget.  I don’t value my church’s role to lead me and protect me as much as I should.  Even if there are many less-than-perfect members of the flock, still, there is safety in numbers.  I need to remember that before I go wandering off on my own ways.  Which brings me to the second point.

“The parables always teach us about ourselves.  The lost sheep is helpless and vulnerable; it needs the flock and the Shepherd to protect and guide it.”  But, I thought in the quiet of the chapel last night, that’s not a description of me.  When I was lost, the LAST thing I felt was that I was helpless and vulnerable, because: I was in control.  I was seeking a better place!  And I had to find it; no church was going to tell me to follow the crowd!  I KNEW better! (I’m so darn smart.)  And as far as “when we return, …” there was no way I was going to choose to return; I was seeking a better place.  And I had to find it, even if alone.

I suspect, for many lost sheep, my attitude describes their attitude.  We are so confident in “our way”, of what we want to do.  That is why the parable is meant for people like me, and others lost.  It says that despite all our confidence, despite all our past successes, and despite the fact that we were blessed with many talents and have always been a leader, on our spiritual journey we are NOT our own leader.  We can never, even with all our great natural intelligence and perseverance, find the way He has planned for us to safely get us home.  He has made us each unique, each with a unique purpose in this world --- so unique that we could never figure it out on our own.  We have to let go of our ego, our independence, and listen for His call, His voice.  He is always looking for us, no matter how far we have confidently strayed on our own path, not knowing how far we were lost.

“I have been the lost sheep many times, and You have always come after me.  Thank You, Lord.  I don’t thank You as often as I should.  I am glad You haven’t given up on me.  Now, please teach me to be like You, to seek and find lost sheep, so I can repay Your love to me by bringing joy to Your heart.

How patient You were with the stubborn, self-righteous Pharisees!  Pour some of that patience into my heart, Lord.  I have too short a fuse.  I know I’m acting like a fool when I harp on others and become exasperated with them --- as if I were perfect.  Help me to think more about the good of my neighbor than the satisfaction of my own desires.  Teach me to love as You love …”