Forgiveness

 

For some reason, I just noticed that Matthew Chapter 18 seems to wander in defining forgiveness.  In 18:15-20, the Gospel says to make every effort to correct what your brother did wrong.  Talk to him, and if he doesn’t get it, take a couple others with you to explain.  Then, if he refuses to listen (thinks he did nothing wrong??), “treat him like a pagan.”  That sounds like no forgiveness of his sin.

But in verses 18:21-35, Jesus says if your brother wrongs you to forgive him 77 times.  It seems Jesus has just said forgive no more than 3 times, and now He says 77?  And what follows that is the parable about the rich man who forgives a servant’s huge debt, but when he hears that same servant won’t forgive someone who owes him a small debt the rich man says to “hand him over to the torturers till he should pay all his debt.”  What?!!  The rich man forgave once, and then later reversed his forgiveness?

So, am I being told to forgive 3 times, 77 times, or once --- and then watch and see what happens after that?

In simplistic terms, I guess the 3 times as my/our trying to evangelize fallen away Christians, or sinners.  The sinner might be someone who “just doesn’t get it,” and after our best efforts we should not provoke anger but just lay back and let a better teacher come forward.  And if he is of a mindset of “I don’t want to get it, because I am always right,” then we pray the Holy Spirit will find a better way to resolve our differences and bring him back to the church.

In simple terms, I see the 77 times point to confession, God will never turn His prodigal child away.  And, at personal level, I shouldn’t be holding grudges or speaking badly of someone who sees life differently than I do.  Causing others to become irritated or angry is causing them to sin.  I’m reminded of that poster in the church narthex, of the face of Jesus and the words to “see the face of Jesus in everyone.”  They are all God’s children, even if I don’t know why He isn’t punishing them --- yet.  I will resolve to always forgive others, and even as I forgive, I will then say the Our Father prayer will total sincerity.

And the rich man, I see as God, Who can forgive anything, even what Adam and Eve did.  But, in that case, forgiveness took a huge act of begging for mercy, by Jesus Christ on the cross.  But, … using the same parable, will the Father at some point pull back that forgiveness, for at least some of mankind?

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And then a differing view was instilled in my heart (with the trigger of a good sermon).

The human person can forgive, love, and even pray at three levels. 

The first level is sensory, when our emotions or reactions drive our decisions to forgive, love, or pray.  Sometimes our reactions are triggered by our senses: “Ouch, that’s hot!  What a gorgeous sunset!  Wow, she’s beautiful. Hey, that guy just cut me off.”  We think of emotions as split-second reactions that we couldn’t stop, but being aware of our emotions does allow us to work on changing them.  Some reactions are vices, sinful if we let them go on with no effort to change.  That’s like going to Confession with no firm resolve to sin no more.  For every vice, however, there is a virtue, and we can grow more virtuous reactions by resolving to do them, until the virtue becomes our split-second reaction, not the vice. 

The second level is a result of a mental choice:  I can will to forgive, love or pray because it is a commandment, and I resolve to obey what God commanded me. While mental implies a thought out function, It can become a rote process, no different than another reaction.

And besides mental and emotional, there is a third function of our human body, our spiritual being.  Prayer can be just rote mental prayers, or emotional reactions, or an awareness that we are always God’s children, and can talk to Him.  We can sincerely ask His forgiveness, or express our love, even in ways beyond words, from our heart.  If we take time away from our body’s mental and emotional triggers, in the deliberate silence of prayer we can tell Him in ways beyond words, and then perceive his love and forgiveness.