When There's No Place To Hide

It was the best of times; it was the worst of times.  This is one of those posts again.

Last week a wound nurse came out and evaluated mom, the first visit by this nurse in the nearly 3 months mom has been in hospice care.  I guess the doctor’s initial evaluation that she wouldn’t be around long led the hospice people to not worry too much about healing her, but his surprise return after two months triggered a “I guess she’s stronger than we expected” opinion, and the subsequent directive to get the wound nurse out to evaluate the many wounds on her skin.

Mom originally entered the hospice program years ago after she fell and couldn’t walk again.  Then they determined she had less than 6 months to live.  About a year and a half later they said “well, it looks like she will be around longer than we thought,” and dropped her from the program. 

Mom never has liked doctors, hospitals, nor medicines, and so she quickly grew irritated at those who would take her blood pressure or listen to her heart.  “I’m okay,” she’d tell them.  And after they left she’d ask me angrily: “What are they doing here?”  But I continued to have a nurse visit every two months to evaluate mom.  And I noticed that a pattern began to develop.  If mom just was not in the mood, or the prodding went on too long, or sometimes even if she even just saw the nurse approaching the house through the front room window, she’d say:  “I’m tired.  Take me to bed.”  That was her hoped-for way of avoiding the situation. 

She began to use that ploy more often as time went by, expanding it to times when she didn’t like dinner, or even times when she was bored.  But with this latest round of hospice care, her ploy no longer worked.  Called out because of bedsores which wouldn’t heal, the hospice doctor proscribed bed rest 100% of the time, until the wounds healed --- which he didn’t expect would happen before her demise.  Saying “take me to bed” now meant nothing because she was already in bed.  And so when nurses visited, or her wound bandages were changed, or she had to be turned in bed every few hours to prevent further wounds, she was often irritated, and sometimes even downright mad, and sought to scratch those near her. 

But there was no place for her to hide.

With the visit of the wound nurse this past week, every one of the dozen or so wounds on mom was evaluated, and a specific treatment proscribed, each with unique types of bandages or salves or ointments, and some with special cleanings --- and each wound bandage was to be changed every day.  To begin, a nurse came every day, carefully going through the written procedure for over an hour, to train the caregivers to do the wound care ---- and to prod, poke, turn, twist, and bend mom.  Every day a nurse appeared, sometimes two, and they and the caregivers would huddle around mom for sometimes two hours.  And mom seemed to dread their coming, but she no longer fought their efforts.  As she was rolled from side to side to expose some open wounds --- and lay on others --- she just closed her eyes and said nothing, but sometimes she just whimpered.  There was no place to hide from the unpleasantness.

And mom, who had increased her hours of sleep before hospice was called (I think, in response to her body’s great effort in fighting the skin wounds and pain), began to sleep even more.  From 16-18 hours per day, it has grown to 20 or more hours of sleep a day.  And most nights when I visit her, she just can’t be woken to eat dinner.  I hope and pray this is part of the natural dying process, as her aged body slowly shuts down.  But what I fear is that all the prodding and poking has gotten to her, and she has found a new place to hide, tightly closing her eyes and mouth at the approach of anyone or anything. 

Dying is a natural thing, but I don’t want it to come about because mom fears living.

In her state of diminished mental ability, I don’t think mom is capable of evaluating her life’s situation.  She instinctually responds to get away from pain or discomfort.  And so in my care for her, I try to minimize it.  I don’t want her to hide from me.

Unlike mom, I have a degree of mental ability (or at least most days I do), and so I am able to consider my life’s situation.  Certainly I am not happy with mom’s dying process, nor my facing it alone.  Many a caregiver knows what this feels like; I am not unique in my feelings.  My life may seem hard right now, but when life is hard it is not the time to hide.

And being a faith-filled Catholic, I know I am not really alone.

My Jesus, I trust in You.

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Does there come a time in life when it has no value?  Does there come a time when the same ol’-same ol’ seems useless, when the loneliness makes you feel it matters not to anyone if you are alive or dead, or when the pain just seems too much?  I think these thoughts are common to many old people, but increasingly they are common to younger people also.  It is not an advertised fact, but suicide rates are way up in most age groups in this country.  Even some of the very young are saying that all the years they might have left, have no value.  And there are calls in many places to legalize assisted suicide ---- for any reason.

Certainly one obvious reason for the decreasing value placed on life is the decreasing thinking about the value of life.  My mom has dementia; she can’t logically consider the value of her life, but I think many other people just won’t.  Mom instinctively reacts to pain; I think that is also the case with many other people.  Taught to value all the physical sensations of life, from sexual arousal to good smells or tastes or comforts, many people have learned that life IS about what they feel.  And so when they feel bad, they perceive their life to be bad, and bad things have no value to them. 

But they don’t think about it.

If someone gave you a huge diamond, and it was written up in the paper and a huge party was thrown to honor you and the great gift, you’d feel pretty good that day.  You would wear that diamond wherever you went, and feel good about the notice of you that it generated, wherever you wandered.  You would feel that the diamond was a most wonderful thing.  But let’s say 75 years pass, and then for you, the diamond is “just that old thing.”  It might still glisten, but you’ve seen it so often --- and even the admiring looks of others --- that the whole thing is boring to you.  What then?  Is the diamond valueless?

Perhaps the diamond might be valueless to you, but is it innately valueless?  Would the world be better off without its beauty?  Would its value or beauty be any more if it were given away to someone else?  The answer is no to any of those questions.  The diamond has an innate value because of what it is, a rare and precious thing.  Only its owner can grow bored with it, but not the world. 

If we can understand that about a diamond, why can’t we understand that about our life, or indeed any life?  How can we think that a child in the womb is a beautiful thing, a gift of God, but if the owner of that womb grows tired of it, the child is useless?  If the mother has had children for too long and so she wants no more, how can it be okay to kill the next one?  If the mother has no children because she is not yet bored with her young playmates, or her work career, or her boyfriend who wants no children; if she is happy with her life and so doesn’t want to change it, how does that make the child in her womb less valuable?  No, like the diamond to its owner, the feelings of the owner may result in her putting no value on the life within her, but it has an innate value, just as the diamond does.  Millions of people could look at the diamond and marvel.  Millions of people could look at her baby and marvel.

And she doesn’t think about that. 

Like my demented mother, she reacts to what she feels.  What others perceive or feel matters not to them.  Like babies, they think love is something they feel, something they get from the world around them.  But babies are meant to grow up and learn, and learn that love is not something they get, but something they give.  They are meant to grow up and love like parents.  They grow up not to stay babies, receiving good feelings, but to learn and think, and to give good feelings.

I give you a new commandment; love one another as I love you.

Whatever you sow you shall reap. 

What should we sow, if not love?

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I perceive that there is a Cycle of Life, which all begins and ends with God.  It seems that life could be described as going through six phases:

Dependency/Need =>  Learning =>  Doing =>  Teaching =>  Praying => Dependency/Humility

Beginning with God, we enter this world as small Dependent beings, with all our needs to be met by others.  As we grow, we learn what we are meant to do in this life, and we do it.  For some Doing is a long phase of life, forty or fifty years, but for others, sports players for instance, the Doing is a small part of their life.  Teaching includes parenting, along with providing others what we have uniquely learned during our life --- we might write about it.  But at some point most people begin to think about death seriously, and Prayer becomes a greater focus.  And if you live long enough, you may become Dependent again, as my mother is.  Only this is a different dependency, and if you are aware of its coming, you must enter it with humility, remembering all you once did for yourself, which your body no longer permits you to do, will be done for you. 

And then you go back to God, from where you began.

There are a couple of other things going on during this Cycle of Life.  In the beginning, God gave you life, but all during that life you are learning how to give it away; you are learning how to love.  This isn’t a phase, but a thing which accumulates; it ages like the body, only not to grow old and withered, but finer, like wine.  If a life has been lived well, at the end it knows how to love as it has never known before, and it willingly gives of itself to God and to neighbor.  This growing in love is growing more in imitation of Jesus, who showed us how to love.  Each of His parables, every single one of them at its heart, was about self-giving love.  We have another name for this growing in imitation of Him; we call it growing in holiness.   Growing in Love, growing in holiness, growing in trust --- they are lifelong growth.

My Jesus, I trust in You.

I think that last point, growing in trust points to one other unique thing about this Cycle of Life we go through.  At a certain point we kind of go through a “hump day.”  Up until then, much of our life is largely up to us.  There comes a point, however, when we reach the peak of our self-dependence, and gradually turn more of our life over to God, and His plans for us.  This point too varies for each life.  Some decide in their teenage years to become a priest, while some decide in their sixties.  Some have a great conversion experience, which starts them on the road to trusting in God.  And for some, it is a very deliberate AND HARD choice, to stop trusting in themselves and begin to trust in God.  That growing in Love over a lifetime is a growing of giving of self.  That growing in holiness is a growing in accepting of God.  This concept of giving and accepting at the same time is difficult for some people to understand; they feel someone has to be in control --- and they feel more comfortable if it is them.  They haven’t learned to trust much at all.

I described beginning to trust more as like the “hump day,” and it might be good for you picture a hump (I won’t try to draw a picture here).   The hump looks like a line that gradually goes up over a period of time, peaks, and then gradually goes down.  Gradual is the key word; it is almost imperceptible from day to day, and it is only after a long period of time that you can look back at where you were on the curve and notice the large change.  If you imagine the hump drawing as being your lifeline, you can perceive that the early part is more difficult, as you begin to climb the hump --- that is when you are in control --- but then you begin to coast somewhat downhill, and things seem easier --- that’s when God is in control.  That gradual easing of burdens should feel good, like a sled-ride down a snow-covered hill, and it does.  Sometimes trusting in God almost makes you feel giddy.  And it should.

There are some people, however, (perhaps a growing number) who can perceive no “hump” in their lives, nor do they want one.  They are in control, want to be in control, and want nothing to do with God.  If they perceive that they have risen in their life through their struggles, like rising on the hump, they then see life continuing that way, always a struggle to stay on the top of the hump.  Instead of beginning to gradually go down the hump, they see a straight line in their life, always hard.  If they could be made to consider turning over their life to God, trusting, they would perceive it as a cliff, a straight drop from their control.  It would seem to be a thing to be feared, and resisted.  Trusting is God is an unknown to them, like the early civilizations which thought there was an end to the earth, and if you sailed far enough you’d fall off.  Looking back at the Cycle of Life, as I perceived it, these people resist moving into the last two phases of life, which are the ones phasing them back to God.

But willingly or not, they will go back to God anyway.  Like those who value only their feelings and see no innate value to life, they haven’t learned to love.  They haven’t learned this key lesson, to learn to love, for which they were born.  I think they are being somewhat like my mom in her dementia; they try get away from God in the final phases of their life. 

But I fear that in the end, like her, they will find that there is no place to hide.

I liked the bumper sticker which read:  If you want to make God laugh, tell Him YOUR plans.   

          

A Letter to Nice Priests

In a way, I am ashamed to be writing these words.  Who am I to take a few moments to offer counsel to priests, those men who have given their whole lives to offer counsel to their flock.  I am not so bold to say here that I have any more grace or more wisdom than even one of them.  What I do have, however, is one thing which I know they don’t.  I have my own life’s experiences, the life which I alone have lived, and whether they knew it or not, some priests have had a major impact on my life, especially some of the “nice” priests.  And so this letter is addressed to them in particular.

My Dear Fathers and Shepherds:

It is because of you that I learned much about the Catholic Church, and my faith grew accordingly.  You were there for me with the sacraments; you were there for me as teachers, and for some of those Augustinian fathers whose high school classes I acted up in, you were there for me as disciplinarians.  All of you in those roles formed my conscience and help set my goals in life.  You gave me a foundation, a good start for me to begin (and later to continue) living my life in a moral and meaningful way.  But I must counsel you on one weakness that I have perceived:  when I actually began leading my life and sometimes returned to you with hard questions, some of you nice priests counseled me on the “niceness” of the sacraments, and then you implied there was nothing more you could teach me (or I needed learn), so long as I led a “nice” life. And so with this advice you stopped being a disciplinarian for me.  You stopped giving me direction, and let me wander on my own.

In that you did me wrong.

I know it was easier for you to take a leadership role with me when I was younger; that is what elders, including my parents, did.  And then when I got older, you wanted to treat me as an adult, to “discuss” our Catholic faith.  I understand this desire, and in truth I wanted to be treated as such.  And so, unfortunately, you made it your foremost priority to advise me in such a way as to keep me as your friend.  You forgot the side of friendship which many friends forget:  a true friend always tells his friend the truth, especially the hard truth.  Seeking to be first and foremost my friend, you forgot that first and foremost you are my shepherd.  I chose my vocation in life, and you chose yours, but in trying to be “nice” to me, sometimes you were not faithful to your sworn vocation.

And my life was the worse for your “niceness.”

I have sinned against many in my life, and many have sinned against me.  But I perceive some of the largest sins against me were those by “nice” priests, who counseled me that some of my sins were “natural,” and thereby acceptable, or less important.  In my youth, I accepted this advice; I know better now.  No sin, which is an offense against the God who created me, is acceptable.  Some sins are most difficult to avoid for various reasons, they perhaps may be “reluctantly” accepted, but they are never acceptable.  The easier sin becomes, the more it comes.  And the more it comes the less happy is your life. 

Priestly words which excused my initial considerations of sin made it easier for me to accept those sins in my life and then, as is the “real” natural thing about human behavior, I pushed to the limits of rational definition of these and many other sins, which I also then considered “acceptable.”

Opening the door a small crack to sin is like opening it to floodwaters; they are hard to keep out and seep in through the smallest opening, eventually eroding it away and making it ever wider, and the floodwaters unstoppable.  And your life cannot but be impacted.

A priest recently assigned to a local parish announced to his new flock how “I am not here to make waves.”  There will be no tough or “controversial” sermons from him.  He will be a “nice” priest, always beginning a sermon with a joke, and always counseling that any problems are “not that bad.”  And no matter what are the sins confessed, “God understands,” and “We’re all sinners.”  So therefore, “I’m okay; you’re okay."  And the people of his flock will have no worries or guilt, and the priest will be liked by all.  And then everyone will live happily ever after --- not!  From my life’s experience, I know that is a lie.

“Well, if you busy of course you don’t have to attend mass on Sundays.” “Feelings are natural things and okay, as long as you don’t physically hurt anyone.” “Everyone has sexual urges – I do too!! – and so it’s okay if you fall into sin sometimes; everyone does.” All these “nice” words are bad advice.  All these “nice” words of counsel are words which destroy lives.

My dear fathers:  we all want to feel loved.  What you must remember, however, is what love REALLY is:  it is not something primarily to be received, but something primarily to be given.  That is the example Jesus gave us with His life and His parables.  He came to love.  The vocation you chose puts you in the role of persona Christi, in the sacraments and on the altar.  He came to love, not to be loved.  And He was crucified.  Your advice must have as its aim to love, as Christ would love, not to ensure that you yourself are loved.  You can’t always be a “nice” guy.

It is not an easy role you have chosen, my dear priests, but you studied long and hard to prepare yourself for it, to be shepherds for a sometimes reluctant flock.  You need to lead us on right paths, even if sometimes they will be hard for us to follow.  And when we must wander on our own, you must teach us ways to go.  As any army officer knows:  leaders can’t be nice guys.  Lives depend on them.  And lives depend on you also, my dear fathers.

The first 20 years of my adult life were spent with what I might describe as “liberal” thoughts, and thoughts which I understood – with the counsel of some “nice” priests – to be moral and Catholic thoughts.  I really never really pondered any key moral issues, because I thought that ANY sin --- no matter how serious --- could be “acceptable” in some circumstances (and in particular, was “acceptable” when it impacted me.)  It was only after crying out to God in pain that my eyes were opened --- a great blessing and mercy to me.  If I would have known at age 20 what I learned at age 40, my life would have been much more productive for God, and much happier for me.  “Nice” advice let me believe that whatever I wanted was okay, and that my life’s focus should on me and my happiness. 

It was bad advice.   It’s advice that many “nice” Catholic politicians have learned so well.

Thank you Fathers, for all you prayers and the sacrifices you make.  I know you mean well, but PLEASE: do well instead.

Sincerely,

A Catholic Re-Vert who, like Augustine, sadly said: “Late have I loved Thee”

The Best Way to Find Jesus, and Peace

I was reading Josef Pieper’s Guide to Thomas Aquinas before mass this morning.  In it I read how the writings of Aristotle were banned by the Church during Thomas’ time but how, in the final ten years of his life, Thomas went on to write twelve commentaries on Aristotle, along with his gigantic work Summa theological.  At that point, who would have guessed that this greatness was to be the future path of his life?  How can any of us foresee the path of our life, much less the best one --- the best one for ourselves or, as with the life of Thomas, the best one for the many others who might follow in the paths which we had trod? 

How can we know the best way to find Jesus and peace in our life?

I’ve been reading some conversion stories on the internet lately.  Each one is uplifting, both for the writer to recall and for the reader to marvel, for that IS what a conversion is, something to marvel at.  I once read how we should always see our faith journey as a marvel, a great and beautiful surprise, like explorers who are wandering through a dark forest and seeing a clearing ahead, walk into the light --- and see the never-before-seen Grand Canyon before them.  Wow!  Wow-wow!!  All they can do is sit down and stare at the awesome beauty before them.  That feeling is how our faith should always make us feel.

Faith is a gift, an awesome gift. It is a seeing what you have never seen before.  But getting to that point, to experiencing that gift, is a part of life’s journey which, unfortunately, not everyone experiences.

Not everyone’s journey goes through dark forests and into bright resting places high above an awesome view.  There are some people who have heard that such a place exists, and they wander from religion to religion searching for it.  If these searchers are dedicated, I believe they will eventually find the Catholic Church, and be awed by it.  It is a thing of beauty --- witnessed by those writing the blogs I have been reading.  There are many conversion stories; EWTN has a television show dedicated to ministerial converts, converts who are current Catholic priests, and those who were former Protestant ministers, Jewish rabbis or other faith leaders.  Converts who have sought the faith, the gift, are most often those surprised at finding it, and are very grateful --- they can’t stop talking about how wonderful the Catholic Church is.

But there are also many people who were born into Catholic families.  If they were taught to know and live the faith well, they too appreciated its grandeur.  Like the converts, they often refer to their Catholic faith as “home;” it is a great comfort to them.  Some born into Catholic families, however, never appreciate their faith; they never have the real gift of faith in their heart.  They are like the children of some rich people --- they don’t realize how blessed they are, and take their riches for granted.  While some would stand on the rim of the Grand Canyon and see beauty, these “always been Catholics” are walking around on the canyon floor.  High walls seem all around them, and are seen not as beauty but barriers.  Rapids and deep river currents seem terrifying.  In its bigness, they can feel all alone.  And so if someone should say: “The grass is greener on the other side,” they are open to leaving, disliking where they have been, but never having seen or appreciated its beauty.  And they think where they are now at is better, but they don’t know what real beauty is.

I wrote a few blog posts about how we know our life’s journey is to get to heaven; we know it and we yearn for it, and yet we wonder:  how do I get there?  The Catholic Church, I wrote, is the roadmap, and Jesus offers to ride with us there, so we don’t get lost.  Together, the map and Jesus, will surely get us to our eternal home --- but there are other ways: they just won’t be as sure, nor as fast, nor as easy.  There are many rough roads that lead to heaven.  And there are many places to get lost along the way.  The Catholic Church makes the journey easier.

The map I wrote about is like that standing on the rim of the Grand Canyon.  It is a high level view of the bigger picture.  This is faith --- the vision that you can see the entire picture, and Jesus is with you to help guide you.  You can talk to Him and let Him point out the best ways to go using the Catholic map.  But He doesn’t dictate the route.  You can look at the map and say: “What if we went this way?” or, “Let’s go see this spot; it’s supposed to be beautiful.”  And He’ll smile and say: “Let’s.”  The Catholic Church has may byways --- and yes, as people sometimes do, they may get confused by even these good things.  The Catholic Church IS made up of people.

What is the best way to find Jesus and peace, peace in this life and the next?  I believe it is the Catholic Church.  It gives you much confidence that you are on the right road, and that you are not alone.  There are many who seek to travel life’s paths alone --- I wrote about the liberal mindset recently, as an example of the many people who confidently say: “I know the way.”  And many of them don’t see life as having heaven as a destination, but seek a heaven here and now.  These people don’t see the beauty of the Catholic Church, but they can’t even begin to imagine the beauty of the REAL heaven.  How sad for them, that they think the best they can have in life is what they get for themselves here on earth. 

Some point to lemmings following one another over a cliff and say: “Never be a follower.”  Others point to the Shepherd who created the green pastures, who said to the leaders of the Catholic Church:  “Feed my sheep.” 

I am not a lemming, but I may be a sheep; I willingly follow.    

The map is there; the destination clearly marked.  Only by “my choice” and pig-headedness can I get lost.  What is the best way to find Jesus and peace?  Well, as every Catholic knows, it starts there with Him on the altar.  We believe He is always with us, and we can come and talk to Him.  And we’re not confused about what the Bible says or what this or that preacher says is the right way to go --- any person with an ego can loudly proclaim: “Follow me!  I know the way!”  But there was only one Way, and Truth, and Life.  And I don’t have to find it myself, alone.  He is there, waiting.  And those who come and find Him there in the Catholic Church are most happy, not necessarily in this life --- He never said this life would be never-ending fun --- but in eternal happiness, and a confidence that while we ARE in this life, we know the way.

And like the bloggers giddy over their conversion stories, we are happy to have found it.

How Liberals Seem to Think

Today was the feast day of St. Boniface, a martyr.  The past few days have been celebrations of the lives of martyrs from around the world.  The priest in his short sermon this morning commented on how these martyrs gave their lives willingly, as they sought to offer the Good News, not for their own benefit, but for the benefit of strangers --- these strangers who then killed them.

And my thoughts leapt beyond the priest’s mind-opening insight.

Many Christian evangelists differ significantly from others who would choose to proclaim their beliefs.  First and foremost, I believe, is that the Christian believes he knows something about the people to whom he would speak.  He believes they are innately valuable, with a dignity equal to his, as bestowed upon them both by a common Creator.  Even if they are not nearly as educated as he, the Christian evangelist has a respect for those he speaks to, and so he “offers” them the Good News.  To their disbelief or questions, he patiently explains answers.  And to their physical weaknesses or needs, he offers charity.

He comes to offer strangers gifts, spiritual and material benefits, and asks nothing in return.  The Christian evangelist invites strangers into his family, “invites”, yet some kill him for his unselfish gifts. 

Why?

My thoughts moved this morning to thoughts of another faith, Islam, which also sends out its members to increase their family of faith.  On one key point, however, Islamic evangelists differ from Christian ones:  they lack respect for the people they go to.  The Christian sees all men as equally dignified by God; the Islamist sees dignity only in people of his faith, so strangers are of less value than him, but they can be increased to equal value if they convert.  The Islamist, therefore, believes a man’s mind can change his dignity; what he thinks determines who he is.  To him, no man is born with any dignity or rights.  And any man who would not choose to think as the Islamist does, never does gain any rights or dignity, hence many Islamists believe infidels can be slaughtered as animals --- because they don’t think properly.

I found these thoughts about how some men value others --- or not --- interesting, but then my mind went to a more general summary of what I had perceived:  there are many men who believe strongly that any men who do not think as they do lack dignity.  The Islamist is focused on religion, but there are men who generalize this thinking into all matters about “for the good of man”.  These people believe that anyone who does not believe as they do lacks a certain dignity; he is “wrong-thinking,” and like the Islamist these self-proclaimed “right-thinking” men feel compelled to take action, “for the good of man.” 

I perceive that this mindset seems to exist most often in those we would describe as “liberal.”

It almost seems a bastardization of the word “liberal” to use it to describe minds closed to any other thinking, confident that they are “right.”   But looking at the Islamist example, I can see how the liberal mindset can indeed think that it is “liberal.”

The Islamist is extremely confident that he knows the truth of what is good for man, and therefore he must ensure other men think as he does --- it is for their own good.  In his mind, he is doing a good thing.  And so the liberal mindset is focused on the poor, for example, and wishes them an equal share of all things, and he will steal from the rich and give to the poor --- because this is a good thing.  Not seeing any innate dignity in all men, the liberal sees no dignity in man’s efforts or the value of work.  Equality comes first, irrelevant if you work for it or not.  And in perceiving the elite value of his own thinking, the liberal lessens the value of other’s thinking --- and their lives.

This seems to be why the liberal mindset more easily accepts abortion.  All men are NOT created equal; some lives are more important than others, and they believe their own “right-thinking” life is the most important.  So it is somewhat natural, to their way of thinking, that the unborn have less value than themselves.  Their own life comes first, and is more important.  An recent unbiased survey showed that the vast majority of Americans are really “pro-life,” only not which life.  While valuing life, some Christians say all life is equally valuable, while others of a liberal mindset would say “No, mine is more valuable than others.”  And the liberal mind would seek to define and impose on others exactly which lives are less valuable, to the point that they may be disposed of.  This is the mindset began with the Age of the Enlightenment philosophers --- those self-defined “right-thinking” men, and continued on in the minds of Hitler, Stalin, and other communist leaders.  They dictated to others because they sincerely believed: “I know what is right.”  And this general thinking seems to be the mindset of many liberals in America and the world today.

To a liberal mindset, the liberal mindset is right, and for all the right reasons.  He desires all the Christian social values and seeks to impose them.  He thinks that by taking away man’s dignity, he is giving him dignity.  He would take away the dignity God gave man, and replace it with a dignity that HE gave to man.  He would value heaven as a good thing, but he would not expect man to choose it, but he would seek to give it to man, here on earth.  That’s why he values the word “choice,” only when he is the one doing the choosing, including imposing unwanted choices on others.  He does have a certain affinity for the Islamist mindset in that he believes it is right to dictate what you believe --- for others’ own good.

I think both the Islamist and the liberal have a problem with the prayer Jesus taught us, the Our Father.  The Islamist believes it is blasphemy to call God as a Father:  he believes God in His immensity cannot be understood by man, nor can His ways --- God is a dictator who man must follow, no matter what.  But although he wouldn’t call God Father, the Islamist does seem to act in the dictatorial manner that he ascribes to his God. 

The Our Father is a prayer said in humility.  “Thy kingdom come, Thy will be done.  Give us this day …, and For Thine is the Kingdom and Power.”  I think the liberal mind rejects this prayer, and the asking for these things from God, for the liberal perceives that he already knows the will of God, and will make His kingdom come, because he has the power to make all good things happen here on earth --- a power that rests not with God, but with the dedicated liberal.  He believes he knows and is acting as a “good-thinking” god.

A liberal mindset individual seeks to outlaw sin --- as he defines sin.  He might allow someone to think contrary, but not to act, which in the long run will destroy the “sinful” thinking.  He would encourage “loving” homosexual acts, destroy “confining” marriage, “choose” life, and make laws to mandate these “good things” in public policy, while criminalizing anyone who would speak otherwise.  And these are thought, by the liberal mindset, to be good things, for the freedom and self-defined happiness of man. 

Christian thinking and philosophy dominated history after Christ.  Unable to reason Christianity away, the “enlightened” minds today seem to have chosen to take over educational systems to teach the young their mindset, and through laws limit others.  I think the liberal mind of today would not accept God’s action in the Garden of Eden:  Ask Adam and Eve not to eat of that tree??  No, no, the liberal mindset would make that tree illegal, put barriers around it and tax the farmer who owns it out of existence so that the tree would die.  Ask Adam and Eve not to sin??  No, the liberal mind would forbid them to sin, or make it impossible for them to sin --- as the liberal mind defined sin.  Jesus said: “Love all, even the sinner.”  The liberal mind couldn’t disagree enough with those words.  Sinners --- those who would choose to disagree with them --- deserve no love.  This, it seems to me, is why there is so much outright hate exhibited in the political arena, by those who are so extremely confident of their right-thinking, and frustrated by others who don’t think the same.

I said that I’ve come to perceive that the Final Judgment day for each individual will consist of but a single question asked by God: “Who do you love?”  The liberal mind will look at his life’s actions and perceive in answer: “Why, myself, of course, because I want to make a heaven for all men just as you do, God.  Isn’t that what I was created to do?”

And I wonder how God will answer him.