Sunday Peace?

Sundays are meant to be a day of rest, a day of peace, and mine usually are. A cup of coffee on the way to church, quiet morning prayers, mass, and me and God getting together. Then a quick breakfast and off to mom’s house. If she naps, I may read – or write as I am now – or just nap too. A day of rest, of quiet peace.

But not today.

As I opened the door to the 7-11 the St. Valentine’s Day cards were right in front of me – along with a huge display of “swimsuit” magazines. I guess that’s so you could buy something for your girlfriend – or boyfriend, if that’s the type of guy you are or have. I was told that if I bought the magazine or a pop, a large centerfold was included. Wonderful. A great thing for the 6-year olds buying pop to take home to their moms or grammas – “Is this what you look like, mom?” And a great thing to be thinking about as I started my Sunday. Grrrrrrrrrrr. The drive to church was just a series of replays of what I wanted to say to that store owner.

I thought I’d be able to restore my peace in church, but the choir decided to arrive early, and the few people there trying to pray were “treated” to practices of songs we’ve all sung a hundred times, with the loud speakers turned up high, I guess to make sure we heard them. I stuck my fingers in my ears as I tried to pray, but I couldn’t concentrate on the words or thoughts. The piano loudly played something akin to the William Tell Overture, and I was waiting for the cannons to go off. There were a few minutes of silence before mass, and I prayed that I might have peace of mind, but my mind wandered throughout much of the sacrifice. I prayed most sincerely when we came to the prayer, Agnus Dei, especially the part where we pray “Grant us Peace!”

When I am anxious, I often remember the WWJD prayer (What Would Jesus Do?), and think on it seriously, trying to get my mind back to a place of peace. Driving home I wondered: Would Jesus really heal the blind man today – so he could see the “Swimsuit Issue” or watch porn? Would Jesus really heal the deaf man so he could hear the constant din in our society, even in His house, or would he think the deaf more blessed in their silence? I know I sometimes think my mom’s hearing loss is a blessing for her – she no longer hears the nearby train horn blasts in the middle of the night, which woke her while she still had some sense of sound. Now she sleeps peacefully and long, like a Sunday blessing of peace – every day and every night!

As I thought some more, I wondered if my distress today is just MY problem. Am I being selfish? The 7-11 owner chose to make money hawking semi-porn, and I chose to be offended. His choice – my choice?? I chose to go to church early to pray, and someone else chose to organize their time by going early to church to practice singing and playing. Isn’t this our society’s “pro-choice” attitude, we both are equally right and wrong and perhaps may offend someone else by our choices, but it’s our choice?

Not really.

Our society’s “pro-choice” attitude assumes that what I do with my time, my body, my “choices” are impacting me alone, but we’ve written much and pondered much in the past on this site about how our choices, ALL of our choices impact someone, in some way – although not perhaps the way they impact us. The 7-11 owner’s choice for profit may ruin some peoples souls. While my praying in church might result in prayers answered or an example for others, this morning putting my fingers in my ears probably only distracted others. Recently I wrote how even being with someone, the smallest presence, can have a major impact on someone’s life – even if we are not aware of it. It’s really John Donne’s No Man Is An Island example. All our choices impact others, which is why it is so important we consider carefully our choices and the impacts beyond us that they have. Love your Neighbor, Do unto others …, Lord, make me an instrument …, are the real choices we should be making, or trying to make with our actions.

All these thoughts are important in considering choices, my choices and yours. But back to the subject of this note, my Sunday peace: what should I be doing about my disquiet, or WWJD? Well, as a man of action I found that the most effective action is often a financial one: I spend about $1000 a year at that 7-11, and donate about $10,000 a year to the church. Going elsewhere and encouraging others to do so is one possibility, which would give me a measure of satisfaction – revenge is sweet, but I don’t think it properly answers the WWJD question. Darn!

So where DO I find peace this day, and close off irritating thoughts, especially on a Sunday? I guess wherever God gives it to me, wherever he gives it to me. So I think I’ll stop this useless worrying and writing, and join mom in watching Dennis The Menace. When things get us down, I find that God always finds a way to make us smile. We just have to look around. Uh-oh, looks like Mr. Wilson is in trouble again – even worse than mine!!! Smile! Relax! Have peace! It’s Sunday! And wow --- I see someone sent me an e-Valentine’s Day Card! Cool! :- ))