How Am I Loved?

God has sometimes opened my heart, to see His workings amidst my life.

The Bible Study guys continued in Romans this morning, and the discussion centered around the fate of those “who don’t know Jesus.”  Paul spoke about some of the Jews who didn’t accept Jesus and the ones, like him, who did.  Would the rejecters not see heaven?  What about non-Christians in the world today?  And then I think God gave me some thoughts on the matter, blending in some of my life’s experiences.

I told the guys of a recent reflection I’d heard in church.  It was on Exodus and the Jews in the desert.  They constantly turned to Moses to complain: “Egypt wasn’t so bad; we had food and work.  Now we’re short on food, water, and wandering.”  And Moses had to remind them of all the wonderous things God, in His love for them, had done.  They so easily forgot.  We too, I was reminded in the reflection, so easily forget.  We get focused on this problem or that in the world or in our lives.  We so easily turn to despair or anger.  And I was reminded how my spiritual director had told me that it’s a good thing to keep a journal --- and I now do --- of God acting in my life.  I don’t think my director specifically said what to write in the journal, but I seem to only write the good things that happened.  This recent reflection on the Jews forgetting the good things God had done should be a reminder, I was told, for me not to forget the good things He has done for me --- to go back and read my journal, especially in bad times.  I’d never done that, I told the Bible Study guys, but it seems a good thought, and it applies to what we had been discussing today; we were focused on who wouldn’t get into heaven, rather that the good things of the Word.

Later, I offered an analogy.  It’s like the relationship of parents to a child.  There are some great loving parents; there are some not so great parents, and there are even parents who give their child up at birth, and the child never even knows them.  Now imagine all these children of these differing parents learn something:  their parents have written a will, and the children will get everything upon the parent’s death.  What will these children think?  Will that knowledge affect their lives, how they relate to those parents?  Certainly, there may be some --- a very small number I’d expect --- who would react with hate, perhaps even promising to reject their inheritance.  And certainly, there will be many who will think: “I knew that they’d do that, because I know how much they love me.”  And I’m sure there will be many who hear of the will and who will stop and think: “Why?  I don’t understand.”  But even in their confusion they will perceive that the reason for the will must be that in some way their parents must love them, likely more than they imagined.  Will this knowledge then change the children’s lives in relation to these still-living parents and perhaps others?  I think so; being loved changes us.

I told the Bible Study guys about Nick, my gym trainer, who gave birth to his first child last week.  For months I’d heard of all the preparations and plans, and Nick even texted me from the hospital.  But then at the gym last week he told me of the moments after the birth of his son in the hospital, and how he held him “skin to skin” in his arms --- and Nick paused with a big intake of breath, and said: “I can’t describe the feeling.  I’ve never felt love like that before, and it was instantaneous; it went all through me.”  And then this man I had perceived as perhaps a so-so Christian said: “I’m sure that must be how God loves us.”  Wow.

The Bible Study guys were discussing how God may relate to some people, or how they may relate to Him.  We can’t not be in this world, and can’t not see --- and judge --- others, but the really, really important thing is how God loves us, and therefore how we should love.

Jesus said for us to love God and love our neighbor --- not only neighbors we think (in our great wisdom) He loves, but ALL our neighbors.  He loves them all.  And if we sometimes forget, we need to recall (or read in our journal) how He loves us --- and all the world.

For God so loved the world,
that He gave His only-begotten Son …

I think we often get hung up on so many things we think are important --- even Bible Study time --- that we forget the really important thing underlying all our worries:  How am I loved?  And the answer to that question should be the thing changing our lives.