God is in Control; Trust Him

 

My friend died this Monday morning.

After dinner last night, I had read the paper, played some games, and thought about recent events in my life, and then --- BOOM!  The thunder was sudden and rattled the windows of my house.  And I suddenly thought “I need to get to the chapel to say my night prayers.”

The drops began as I backed out of the garage, and were a deluge downpour seconds later.  I couldn’t make out cars on the subdivision streets through the rain.  Driving to the chapel, streetlights were difficult to see, and dark-colored cars in front of me almost invisible.  Huge puddles formed across the road in minutes; I drove slowly because I couldn’t see.  When I reached the church, I turned into the chapel parking area and had a thought about starting my night prayers in the car, when moments after I parked, the rain suddenly stopped.  I got out of the car and went into the chapel --- where the monstrance and host were exposed on the altar, with no one else there.  Jesus is NEVER to be left alone like that, and I’ve never seen it happen before, but there it was.  My prayers were sincere and lengthy last night, and as other people began to come and go, so did the rain outside, although never as intense as when I first drove to the chapel.  It was as if the skies did not want me to get there, where Jesus was alone, and did not want me to pray for my friends, who so needed prayer.

 

This morning, I woke early to drive to the 6:45A mass.  The church is usually opened by 6:15, but as I arrived at 6:20, all was dark in the church.  I prayed in my car for 10 minutes; nothing changed.  I thought about leaving (perhaps the mass was cancelled??), but I got out of the car with my Liturgy of the Hours prayer book and stood in front of the locked doors, reading my morning prayers.  It was about 6:38 when the lights went on and the doors were opened.  And I was reading in my morning prayers Psalm 31:

In you, O Lord, I take refuge.
Let me never be put to shame.
In your justice set me free
hear me and speedily rescue me.
Be a rock of refuge for me,
a mighty stronghold to save me.

A couple of hours later I began my Meals on Wheels delivery route, which is usually 12-15 stops.  Yesterday from my garden I had picked about 75 large ripe tomatoes, so I bagged about 40 in 8 bags. When I saw the route this morning, it was only 10 stops, and then I found two of them not at home. So, in addition to food, this morning everyone got some of my tomatoes.  It was near the end of the route when one of the trailer dwellers took the food from my hand, saying “Thank you, thank you.  I really needed this.  And at the next stop, no one answered, so I turned around and gave that food to the man in need.

In that and all these events, I had seen a lot of God’s timing, but as I signed out of the food distribution point at the end of my route, intending next to go visit my friend in hospice, my phone rang.  The screen indicated it was my friend who I was going to visit.  I was surprised to see her call, because on Friday when I had seen her, the end seemed near.  Had she had a rebound?  And so, I answered the phone “Well, hello Diana.”  And the response was “This is Chris her son.  Mom died at 6:38 this morning.” We then talked some about this wonderful woman, and then he said: “You know, I am a pretty sound sleeper, but this morning I woke, wide awake at about 6:30.  I laid there for a bit and then got up to go to the bathroom, and before I got back to bed the phone rang from the hospice, telling me about mom.  I don’t believe in coincidences, especially like that.”  And I agreed.

A Forgiven Killer

 

In a recent conversation, I was led to recall an incident I had read of in the paper, about a killer who was forgiven by the parents of the person killed.  The reason it made the paper was that, not only did the parents forgive the killer, but the entire Amish community, which felt it lost a beloved son, forgave the killer.  He was invited to an Amish service, where all could express their forgiveness to the killer.  It was such a remarkable event that it made the national newspapers.

Tonight, as I knelt in church after receiving communion, out of the blue I suddenly recalled the incident of the forgiven killer, and I also realized that I too am a forgiven killer.  Jesus, who died because of my sins, forgave me and now willingly comes to be with me.  He forgave my sin which resulted in His death, and not only a church community but God Himself (!!) forgives me.

There are no headlines big enough to scream how remarkable, how remarkably loving and forgiving, our God is.  And I can’t thank Him enough.

Seeing is Believing, But Some Are Blind

 

I wrote recently of a woman I know who is dying.  Since then, she has gotten much worse.  To make a long story short, through a large number of “coincidences” she is now in an in-patient hospice facility, where she is getting the 24/7 care she needs.  She will not die alone.  I know many people would look at the stream of just-at-the-right-time, just-in-the-right-place circumstances and say “Boy, was she lucky.”  I’ve said before that I don’t believe in coincidences, nor in luck.  I believe there is a God, and He does answer our prayers.

Sometimes God does answer our specific prayer immediately, just as we asked.  That is rare, but it has happened, even to me.  The Surrender Novena addresses this, where it notes that often we pray asking God to do something specifically.  The Novena says that praying like that is like the child going to the doctor and saying “here’s what you need to do to heal me.”  The child is not a doctor, and does not know exactly what is wrong with him, nor exactly what are the options for healing, yet often that is how we pray, telling God what we want Him to do. 

As I watched my friend grow weaker, I did have thoughts of healing, and I did have thoughts of helping her to bear the pains, and I did have thoughts of: just take her quickly.  But those weren’t my overt, reflective prayers to God.  My prayers are now consistent, for God’s mercy on our country, those He brings into my life, and me.  Like the Surrender Novena concludes, my prayer effectively is: “Jesus, take care of everything!”  And I try to, in my heart, trust, as in the Divine Mercy Prayer: “Jesus, I trust in You.”  That was and is my prayer for my friend.

Whether you want to say God answered my prayer, or someone else’s, or that He just acted out of love for His little child, it doesn’t matter.  I know God did make circumstances occur which resulted in her being loved.  I thank Him.  She thanks Him.

I know there are increasing numbers of young people who no longer believe in God, nor pray.  To them, everything IS just coincidences.  There were many people like that in Jesus’ time, those who saw the miracles yet still didn’t believe.  My prayer includes them too, and God loves them too.  Perhaps a good “coincidence” will happen when they need it.  Maybe, but I’ve seen prayers answered, and would rather trust in a God I can’t see than wait for a “maybe”.