I Saw God

 Yesterday had its share of troubles and worries.  So many people sick, so many dying, and so many lost souls.  Polls show the majority of Christians our state will vote in favor of the most unlimited abortion law in the country.  And our governor, who will “fight like hell” for unlimited abortion, is the same one who sent Covid patients into senior living centers, and thousands of seniors died in our state because of her actions.  Acting in favor of death for the young and the old, she too is leading in polls.  And today as I set out for morning mass, it seemed to continue:  the sky was dark, but I praised God for how much He loves us --- and for His mercy.

Driving West, I suddenly was blinded by the glare in my rear-view mirror.  Through a narrow slit in the clouds, just above the horizon, the bright sun rose in the East. And as I drove, I could see a rainbow appear across the clouds in the Western sky.  When I neared the church, even as a few drops or rain were hitting my windshield, in front of me I saw a row of tall trees, brilliantly sunlit from top to bottom, with the dark sky over and the dark ground under, a snapshot of beauty in the darkness.  And I praised God.  He showed me all was not dark.

Arriving at the church, I saw Marie getting out of her car in front of mine, and entering saw Sarah greet us, and then I saw Amy, who sat first in line for the after-mass confession.  Friends I infrequently saw, I saw at once.  And then before mass began, I read some of my morning prayers, and felt greeted by God:

                        Hymn:

O help us listen now, as then,
And wonder at your words again.
We all have secret fears to face.
We seek your truth; we need your grace.
O help us live what we believe
In daily work of heart and hand.

 

Dawn finds me ready to welcome you, my God.
I will call upon you, save me.
And I will do your will (Ps 119)

In every age, O Lord, you have been our rescue. (Response Psalm)

We who have been reborn through the sacrament of Baptism experience intense
joy when we feel within us the first stirrings of the Holy Spirit.  These gifts enter
us like a gentle rain, and once having done so, little by little, they bring forth
fruit in abundance.

Father, guide us as you guide creation, according to your law of love.  May we
love one another and come to perfection in the eternal life prepared for us.

 

The priest said our life’s journey is like a AAA Trip-ticket.  You see the whole route as a journey to heaven, but on the first page is only the next 100 miles or so, and when done with that you turn the page and look at the next.  And for each page of that journey, God gives us the grace necessary for that step.  On each page, we see side roads, which might have tempting sights, but we must be careful not to delay, or get lost.  And perhaps we eagerly await the next page, where a favorite restaurant is on the route, only to arrive and see it closed.  Or we may anticipate the beautiful sights of the next page, only to arrive there and see a driving rain so hard you can hardly see the road.  Don’t live for tomorrow, the priest said, just use God’s grace for today well.  Your life is a blessing.

The mass itself seemed alive for me today, as I lived with Jesus, as He said His words, and made His sacrifice --- for me.  And He came to me.

And as mass ended and I lifted up my brievary, I noticed the prayer booklet tucked inside the front cover:  You Are Not Alone; Prayers in Dark Times.  I turned it over, and read the back cover:

Be With Me When All is Dark

Lord Jesus Christ, long ago at my baptism I became Your child and
disciple.  I have often tried to recommit myself to following You
despite my failures.  I am weak and confused.  When darkness
comes into my life, I feel discouraged, rejected by You, a scavenger
along life’s highway.  I forget that most of my fellow travelers at times
have the same feelings and undergo the same painful trials.

Be with me in the dark times, and give me, please, some sign, some
awareness of Your presence.  Send me a ray of hope when the road
is long and weary and I feel alone.  Send Your Holy Spirit that I may
know in some way that you are still with me when all is dark.
Amen

 

And I left the church.  As I walked outside, a light rain was falling, but after the morning events, I felt as if the day were bright.  The rain was temporary.  The sun would shine again.  I was not alone. He is still with me in the dark.