How to Live My Life

I spent some time before the Lord tonight, and I was reading: “Joseph Ratzinger, Life in the Church and Living Theology”. The book explains what has gone on in the Catholic Church since Vatican II, and in particular what Joseph Ratzinger – a genius in our time – thought and taught during that period. It boiled things down to explain how and why he lived his life.

On the way home, in the quiet and dark of the drive, I thought about my own life. How am I living it – and why? Some friends don’t understand my compulsion to learn more, my constant reading. “That’s you, and I’m me, and we’re just different”. Perhaps. But I have a compelling reason for wanting to know more, and it’s WHAT I want to know more about and WHY that compels me. I believe it is for a very good reason.

Heaven is the ultimate unification of God and me. “We shall know him as he is”. That’s the teaching of the Catholic Church, a virtual deification of ourselves. That’s heaven. To me, it explains WHY it is a beauty beyond our understanding, but also why I so desire it. In heaven, united was God as I can be, I’ll know all of the reasons for my existence on earth – and how well I did there. I’ll know all the purposes of God, and the reason for the being of everything. I’ll know total, entire, limitless love – getting and giving it. In short, I will have no anxieties. “This is eternal life, that they know thee the only true God, and Jesus Christ whom thou hast sent” - Jn 17:3. There will never be anything to worry about again. It will be a Joy as perfect as I can bear it. I look forward to that day.

So what of this life, now? Why not live with the anxieties of the day, and do what it takes to make them go away until then? Why not stop along the way and “smell the roses”? Why not “live in the moment” and make my existence, for now, as enjoyable as it can be. Why worry about the future, when today has enough worries of its own?

The simple, and yet complex, answer is that life is a journey, and if I don’t pay attention to how and where I am traveling, I might not get to my desired destination. Heaven is a desired, but not guaranteed destination. I can enjoy the journey, but I must not think that traveling is the purpose of my life. The purpose is the end of the traveling, the final destination.

To get there, I need first of all to WANT to get there. I am a logical person; I never travel anywhere without knowing where I am going, and why. And once I decide on a destination, I prepare for the trip, and my arrival. That’s what I am doing with all my reading and studying and attempting to understand my life’s purpose and how to live it well – to prepare for and make a safe journey, and to know and understand and love God more – to prepare for my arrival.

Look, think of heaven in terms of your perfect wedding. God, the beautiful bride, is waiting there for us, and “this is THE one”, the one who will make us happy forever. This will be the perfect marriage, the real forever. There won’t be any “and for worse”, nor “in sickness”, nor even “’til death do us part.” None of that negative stuff. THIS IS the perfect bride, waiting for us. Waiting for us to take that final vow, that ultimate consummation of the marriage.

I can see that destination. So as I travel to that wedding, why would I want to “stop and smell the roses” – there’s a gigantic room full of roses waiting at the destination! Why would I want “live in the moment” of the journey, when I know – I KNOW – that my real moment begins when the journey is over.

“You will come to a time when you believe everything is finished … That will be the beginning.” (Louis L’Amour)

And why would I ever stop and roll in the mud along the way, and risk embarrassing my bride by arriving to her beauty and preparations for me like some soiled bum. I don’t want her to be embarrassed by me. And so I’ll try to stay clean along the way, and maybe even try on a tux to see what it feels like. And besides getting myself ready, of course I’ll want to invite my friends to my wedding. And if they need some help, I’ll pay for some of their travels – I may buy them some new clothes, some bridesmaids gowns. I’ll want them there with me, celebrating with me. I don’t want them left out for any reason I can do something about.

That’s how I want to live my journey, my life. That’s why.

And that’s why with some of these writings I hope that you will be less anxious about your life. You’ll see and focus on the party we’re going to. If you don’t understand how great the party will be, ask me. And if you’re worried about getting lost, travel along with me. And in your getting ready and in your travels, you will find Joy in this life – and you’ll want to bring along some of your own friends, too. That’s ok, there’s lots of room at the mansion where we’ll meet.

And if your friends need some help with the basics along the way, just let me know. My bride has a huge dowry, and she’s given me some in advance. You need help, let me know. I’ll buy!

Well, let’s get going. I look forward to seeing you guys there.

Don’t get lost along the way!!