We Will Never Forget This Lent

Things are happening to me in a way which they have never happened before.  I have often felt God’s presence in the quiet of the adoration chapel, His Spirit sometimes overwhelms me there, with thoughts and insights.  I don’t recall, however, --- or at least not often --- that feeling, that sense of Presence in my own home.

Last night, I did go to the adoration chapel, starting my night prayers there with the rosary, praying in particular for our country as I do every Sunday night.  Last night, however, as I fingered the beads of the Patriotic Rosary and I prayed for each of the 50 states one by one, I looked at each bead with its two-letter abbreviation for a state, and my thoughts perceived many things about that state and the suffering happening there right now.  My heart was heavy and I felt somehow united with them, the dying, those trying to help them and those praying for them.  And I felt sad but I knew God was present with them, and He too was sad.  I thought briefly about writing these thoughts last night, but they were only my personal thoughts and feelings.  This morning, there was more.

I rose early to say my morning prayers, and once more words I read hundreds of times in the past now spoke with a new meaning to me.  They weren’t words about history; they were words about right now.  They weren’t parables about past events, but parables to explain what is happening today.  And before today and these times, they could not have had such a meaning for me --- and for the world.

My prayers began with Psalm 95, and I read the words: “Today, listen to the voice of the Lord”; they spoke to me.  Then I read Psalm 73, which questions why the good have many troubles, but its concluding lines note: “I was stupid and did not understand, no better than a beast in Your sight.  Yet I was always in Your presence; You were holding me by my right hand.  You will guide me by Your counsel.”  The words spoke to me, as a reminder to trust, especially in these dark times.

The reading from Leviticus in my prayers said how Aaron was to offer atonement for the sins of himself and his family.  It mentioned how after touching sinful things Aaron must bathe his body in water before he visits others --- and I thought how we now must wash our hands to prevent the spread of the virus.  Then I read Psalm 90:

Make us know the shortness of our life,
that we may gain wisdom of heart.
Lord, relent.  Is your anger forever?
Show pity to your servants …

And then I read this petition: “Forgive us for failing to see Christ in the poor, the distressed and the troublesome, and for our failure to venerate Your Son in their persons.”  And after reading these things, my mind slipped away from prayer, to some words I had read in the paper about a doctor in Italy.  He said they must use their limited equipment on those under 60; they must prioritize who they will try to save, or let die.  In a war that is called triage.  I have not seen it said, but we ARE at war.

I didn’t complete my prayers when I saw that it was 8AM, time for mass on EWTN.  The entrance hymn sung was from Psalm 31: “As for me, I trust in the Lord.  Let me rejoice in Your mercy, for You have seen my affliction.”  And with that, my whole attention was focused on the screen and the words spoken.  The First Reading of the mass was from Isaiah 65:17-21, and I heard words of hope: “No more shall be heard the sound of weeping and the cry of distress.  No more shall there be an infant that lives but a few days, or an old man who does not fill out his days …”  And the words of hope continued in the Responsorial Hymn: “I praise You, Lord, for You have rescued me.”  Then the subsequent Gospel words were a parable for today.  In Jn 4:43-54 Jesus says: “Unless you see signs and wonders, you will not believe.”  But the centurion did believe, and his son was healed.  And I knew Jesus was using those words to give us a sign for today.  Trust in Him.

I was hearing and considering all these things as the priest than began his sermon, which quickly got my full attention.  I will paraphrase. 

 “The masses and readings of recent days have been viewed by us believers in a new light, with ‘new eyes’.  This is a great blessing for us.  Mid-day yesterday, we heard: ‘By waiting and calm you shall be saved, in trust.  Blessed are all who wait for Him.  By waiting and in calm, you shall be saved (Isaiah).’

In times like these, the great temptation is to say: Why have You abandoned us, Lord?  Why have You allowed this to happen?  We can use these words in blame and in bitterness --- or, with faith.”  And then the priest read from Psalm 10: ‘‘God hears us --- but do we hear Him?  The thoughts of the wicked are that there is no God.’”  Then the priest read from Psalm 23: “‘The Lord is my Shepherd … Even though I walk through the alley of the shadow of death, I fear no evil; for You are with me …’”

Then the priest paused:  “Turn off the news.  Read Scripture.  Our hearts and our minds are made for contemplation, especially in these times of trial.

We will never forget this Lent.

The priest said that his prayer and that of his fellow priests is that everyone may hunger for God more during these days.  He noted how during the Tridium we will renew our Baptismal promises.  We will renounce Satan.  And when asked: Do you believe in the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit, we will answer “We do.”  We must answer those words as never before.

In these days we are being invited into a new life with Jesus Christ.  Jesus said to the woman at the well: I thirst.  He thirsts for your faith today.  He healed the blind man; let us pray for a new set of eyes, to see Him gazing in love upon us, to give us new eyes of living faith.”

And then the mass continued, and what continued for me was the feeling that many of the same old words I had heard before were now said with new meaning, meaning for today.  I heard the many prayers prayed in Latin during this mass, and I heard in my heart those same words echoing in masses right now throughout the world, praying: “Agnus Dei …” 

Lamb of God, You take away the sins of the world, have mercy on us.