Too Many People

On a recent morning a friend who I respect mentioned casually that there were too many people in India. “They need to get their population in line; those 1.3 billion are just too many people. No wonder they have so much poverty and are looking for our jobs.”

I was not shocked at his words; certainly I’ve been hearing words like that my entire life, but I took up defense of the people of India --- perhaps a bit too vehemently, I admit, and perhaps too loudly. (I admit that raising my voice when passionate is a fault of mine, and one I find most difficult to overcome.) I voiced defense of India from strictly a human, logic, and factual point of view. For many reasons, India has made great progress in caring for its people – all of them – although certainly there is much progress to be made. Still, the words I heard in my youth: “By 2000, half the world will be starving” have not come to pass. Huge strides in crop yields have pushed back that dire prediction, and pushed it back forever according to the most recent trends of falling birth and population rates, even as crop yields continue to rise.

I voiced my passionate defense of India based merely on logic, and for that reason my argument was weak; it was weak because I didn’t think my friend would hear or think about the real, definitive argument: killing any person is wrong, and wishing them dead in our hearts is just as wrong. I did my friend an injustice in thinking he wouldn’t understand this argument, that he could only understand the dumbed-down logic seen in a newspaper; that he couldn’t see the truth. I was wrong in judging him --- as he was wrong in judging others also.

I think many people judge the value of others, whether said aloud or in their hearts. They compare and think: “They are not as important as I am” and they let that thought go on to: “Therefore, I deserve more than they do.” If there are good things, I will appreciate them more. If there is a shortage of things, even food, I should be fed. If someone should die, it should not be me. Many people think this way, and many think this is good --- a healthy ego is a good thing. Perhaps, but not when it equates human importance with worth.

Some human beings ARE more important than others in this world, largely by circumstance of birth, but also perhaps even in the plan of God. “There but for the grace of God go I” is a true statement, in that regard. But a man’s worth, his true worth, is equal to others in God’s eye. All are equally worth EVERYTHING. Remember the meditation here of a few days ago (The Father’s Sacrifice)? Abram offered to kill his son for God, but God DID kill His Son --- for us. We are worth that much. From that viewpoint, we each are as important as God Himself. Who are we to say that one of us is worth less than himself, when God would not say that? But it is a sad fact that we do. Ever since the Garden of Eden, man has yielded to the temptation to want the fruit that would make him like God; he wants to be most important. Perhaps that is just an echoing of the image in which we were created, that of the MOST important. But despite all our yearnings --- and temptations --- we are not God, yet, and on this earth we never shall be.

Today is the feast day of St. Edith Stein (Teresa Benedicta of the Cross). Born Jewish, then a choosing atheism, then a philosopher, then Catholic, then nun, she spent her life searching for truth --- and found it. When friends worked out plans to rescue her from the Nazi gas chamber she replied: “Do not do it! Why should I be spared? If I cannot share the lot of my brothers and sisters, my life, in a certain sense, is destroyed.” She understood the value of each human life; if someone was to die “Why should I be spared?” She chose to die even though from a more logical viewpoint, her education, talent, and actual and potential contributions to the world, she may have been the most “important” person in her country, perhaps even Europe. But she knew that importance does not equate to worth.

As I received communion this morning I prayed “Lord, I am not worthy to receive You.” That is a true prayer, recognizing both my importance and my worth. A God was willing to die for me, but that is His valuation of me: my eternal value in the eternity He created me for. But now, right here and now, I am not worthy to be with Him. It is something I want; it is something I yearn for, this “to be as God is.” I want to be more important than other people in the world, in His eyes. But it is in His eyes, not mine, that the importance of a man is judged. The least important old man, or even baby, in the worst slum in the world, may be exactly the important person in His plan, exactly as He made him to be. Despite all my self-perceived importance, in the eyes of God I may be a failure, for failing to use all the gifts He has given me, for failing to be who He created me to be, for failing to really be what He knows I am worth, and what I could be worth in eternity. He didn’t make heaven for me to be in as I was, but for me as I am to become. I could spend eternity united with Him; I could truly be as a God --- but not here on earth.

“Lord, I am not worthy,” I’m really not, but I want to be. “Be with me, Lord, as I try to grow in holiness, as I try to be as You are, as I try to be all that You created me to be --- with You.”

There indeed may be too many people on this earth. Perhaps I am the one who should leave. Who am I to think that I am the one to judge?

Peace be with you, my friends, as we all struggle to grow in holiness. As yet, we all are not worthy. As yet.